#I'm gonna settle down because i can go into detail on this. but. i shouldn't

[transgender-catboy]

*laying on my stomach, kicking my feet and twirling my hair*

Hiiiii 💖💖💖

[sml8180]

How often do they show their genuine emotions to others versus just the audience knowing?

Who have they forgotten about that remembers them very well?

What do they commonly misinterpret because of their own upbringing / environment / biases? How do they respond when realizing the misunderstanding?

(Based on who you wanna answer for at the moment.)

(Sorry this took a bit to get to, things got a little busy-)

I'm gonna answer for Operative Ghost (Megan Kendall), seeing as I need to work on developing her a bit more. Maybe later I'll do another post and answer for Phoenix

How often do they show their genuine emotions to others versus just the audience knowing?

Unsurprisingly, as a Zoraxis Operative, Ghost doesn't often show her genuine emotions to other characters, especially in a direct way. She keeps her cards close to her chest, in a sense.

There are exceptions, mostly in the form of Beaker, another Operative (he's a scientist, and went through lower-level training with Ghost). She sees him as a good friend, and knows that it's unlikely he'd turn around and spill the things she tells him to others.

Who have they forgotten about that remembers them very well?

Ollie. He might not remember her very well, but well enough, and far more than she remembers him.

Can't go much more in-depth, since some of those details might come up in later chapters for Ash and Shadow.

(putting the last one under a cut because it got very long-)

What do they commonly misinterpret because of their own upbringing / environment / biases? How do they respond when realizing the misunderstanding?

This one's trickier. This is the best way I can answer this one:

For context, Ghost (like Elliot) mostly followed what her parents wanted. She listened to her mother, and for some time believed that the way she could succeed would be to act the part of a "Proper Girl". Keep in mind, Ash and Shadow takes place in the late-1960s (around 1967-1968), the twins and Phoenix were born in the 1930s; Ghost and Phoenix especially would have had the idea that A Man would fall for them if they did everything Right pushed on them while growing up. Megan listened, while Phoenix didn't.

The world slapped her in the face when "Mr. Right" found Someone Better and left her with nothing, forcing her back to the tiny, dying town she'd grown up in. She pulled a 180 of sorts and applied to join Zoraxis not long after, she was accepted just days after the fight between her parents and Phoenix (which she and Elliot were roped into).

As for how that impacts her world view and how she interprets things? She's still working through the idea that Girl does not have to mean Fragile. The age old, "Girls can't/don't/shouldn't do X" still heavily impacts how she sees things.

This also extends to Phoenix. In Ghost's eyes, Adrian and Agent Phoenix are basically different people. They're both pests, but Phoenix can't possibly be Adrian, her annoying little sister who she cared about but couldn't stand at the same time, who refused to settle down and just listen to Mama.

She realizes this is hypocritical, that she's a strong woman who no longer fits in the box she was told she was supposed to. She gets frustrated, more than anything.

She did everything right, so why did things go so wrong?

She was supposed to be one thing, so why is she a ghost of that instead?

[pokeexehasstoppedworking]

Diamond In The Rough ch15 Settling Down In Circhester P4

Gordie paused and he slowly looked up to Elsa. "It's okayin' my transfer to where?"

Her response was to turn the paper around with the official seal and the fancy writing and held it up to his blinking face. "It's okayin' our temporary transfer to the Pasio Region! You've been chosen to compete in the Masters League!" A bright smile was beaming on her face and her eyes were starry like, "Well...actually only you an Mum's been chosen."

Her big brother didn't answer at first instead taking the letter from Her and immediately opened it, breaking the seal and opening the folded paper to let eyes dance across the words plastered across it. It was thick too. The reason why was because there was already a passport, cruise ticket, and everything else he needed to take a trip overseas along with the very long and very detailed explanation from the Chairwoman in the letter for the Masters League and that he'd be going to Pasio for-....

"A whole year!?"

Elsa perked up hearing Gordie's voice and found her big brother staring at the paper wide eyed in disbelief. "Wha- No. Just ten months but almost a year! And you're leavin' at the end of this month! Isn't it exciting, Gordie?"....She blinked as Gordie still stared at the letter in his hands. "Oi! Are you alright?"

Gordie finally blinked to her before opening his mouth, closing his mouth, and then looking back to the letter. "I-...Y-Yeah..I'm good." He beamed a smile at her again. "This is great news, Elsa! C'mon. H-Help me hang up these tinsels then we can set up the Christmas tree."

He distracted himself by setting up the Christmas decorations and having dinner with his family before taking time out to actually look at everything he was sent. The Prince had found his battling exceptional and thus had picked him along with a few other Gym Leaders, his mother included, to come compete in the Masters League. And they were leaving right after the Christmas holiday. His FIRST Christmas he wanted to celebrate with YOU!! He wasn't expecting this so soon! How was he even supposed to break the news to you!? Well...Turns out he had to break it to you sooner rather than later when you came to visit him unexpectedly and by then he decided to rip off the band aid and tell you what exactly was going on. Your reaction was as expected when he showed you the official letter from the Chairwoman and felt guilty as your face went from happy to shocked. 

"W-What!? You're gonna be gone for THAT long!?"

"Y-Yeah." He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly and guiltily. "*sigh* It's not like I was expectin' it either." He felt terrible about all of this. He wouldn't be there to watch you graduate or spend New Years' Eve with you or spend so many other holidays with you. "But..This 's a big opportunity for Galar and for everyone else. I-...I was thinkin' about it and I think it would be best if I went, but I couldn't leave without tellin' ya."

"W-What about your brothers and sister?," you pointed out, "With both of you gone, who's going to look after them? And your gyms?"

"Dontcha worry. We already got our workers ta look after the gym, an' as for my sibs, a good family friend of my ma's is comin' over to watch 'em all for us! She's really great with kids and has watched them before. So they'll be well taken cared of. It's...I-It's what you thought about all this that worried me the most. Long distance in a relationship d-doesn't sound like something you'd like."

You nodded. "You're right. It's not something I like." He seemed to look dejected for a second before you reached out for him. One hand grabbing his and the other coming up to cup his cheek to make him look at you again. "But it shouldn't make you not want to go. I want you to go if you want to! I think you'd be great out there in the pokemon league! I love you and I won't hold you back."

With each word you spoke, his eyes went wider and wider until he stared at you like an owl. Until he smiled, chuckled, and allowed himself to lean into your hands. "Now I know why I fell for ya in the first place.~ I love ya so much."

"I love you too. And I want to do something to make things less stressful for you."

"Jus' spend time with me," he answered pulling your hand closer to his heart and leaning into your own touch. "That's all I ask for. It's all I want for us."

"Then that's what I'll do. In fact, I'll do you one better."

Something soft grabbed his hand and he froze still staring at the snowy ground beneath his feet. A sight he was hesitant to leave when he turned back to look at you again. Huh. And you were both closer than he remembered. Just a few inches from one another twinkling under the lights. And you blinked at the sudden closeness too. Face going a dim pink and a few chuckles from the moment escaping you. Barely anyone was outside now, or pokemon for that matter. So it was just you two. Alone out here with nothing but each other for company. His mind felt completely blank and numb but in a good way, compelling him to reach his hands up and cup a cheek of yours something his rational brain wouldn't allow himself to do. Inches away now. You didn't move away. He stared at the woman in front of him, this woman with the beautifully flowing hair and the cute smile. If he was watching this as an outsider, he would've laughed at how they were literally just strangers less than a while ago, but right now it didn't seem any of that or anything else mattered. The wind blew some more rustling the snowflakes and blowing some of that pretty hair into his face, which he immediately reached to pull away and Y/n made no move to stop him from doing that. Or removing the hand that now cupped her cheek. Maybe it really was a mutual madness they both shared or some form of chaos in their lives, but right now....With them being so close...And so vulnerable. It was only natural of course-.. It's what soulmates do-.. Of course they would since-...

They kissed.

Gordie was leaving. For a full year, and he wouldn't be back until the very next year. You were in shock when he first broke the news to you, then heartbroken. You guys were just starting out and now he had to go away for another full year!? It wasn't fair! But there wasn't anything either of you could do anything about it. After all this was a big opportunity for him and it was an honor to compete in the very first ever Master's League so...You understood. That doesn't mean you didn't like it though. Gordie was one of the first Galar gym leaders to leave. He had one month to prepare to go on this extended trip so he spent it filling out the required paperwork, packing, and spending as much time with you and his siblings as possible. That's right. You weren't the only one who was upset he'd be gone for such a long time. And then soon it was time for him to leave at the end of the month. He'd be heading to Hulbury to catch a ship which would take him to the Pasio Region. Almost all of Circhester had gathered to see off their gym leaders which was filled with a few congratulations and goodbyes. He made sure to hug the triplets and Elsa good bye.

"Keep an eye on the gym and don't worry about paying the staff alright? The Chairwoman's already taking care of that for me. Be good for Auntie Sally ok?," Melony was fussing over her children like any mother would.  "Don't be out late and don't go anywhere without telling Auntie Sally first. You just make sure you do good in school and don't let Snowball in the house again! "

He then turned to you when all was said and done and you two stared at each other for a silent moment, before he held his arms out offering you a hug and you gladly took it wrapping your arms around his middle and him hugging you back.

"And YOU be careful living out there," he mumbled, "I don't want you getting hurt again and I can't be here to help you. Just the thought of that happenin' makes me mad I gotta go. If ya need anythin' call me. I don't care 'bout the stupid Masters League. I'll swim across the ocean and come back if I have too."

You chuckled. "Don't be so dramatic. I'll be fine. You just go and show everyone what you can do. Besides it's only until next year right? It won't be that long."

Although it would sure feel like it. He then left. Picking up his suitcase and giving the crowd one last good bye before he entered the taxi and took off for Hulbury leaving you to stand there and just watch it before it faded into the tiniest black speck, and then into nothing.

The following months were peaceful but almost bland and boring as you settled into a routine. Get up, go to school, get homework done, and then come back home. All day every day. You still on instinct looked over your shoulder expecting Gordie to be knocking at your door any moment to visit but he never did and you would feel disappointed. You still gone off in your life. Most of the hard assignments was over. School didn't end until around the end of February so those last two months of school kept you busy and helped to keep your mind off things, and it all went ok. Gordie had left one last gift to you before he left, he had message your battle studies teacher and attested to witnessing you catching three of your pokemon which was proof enough to help you pass that assignment. You'd be sure to make up that kindness to him later when he came back. But soon even the classes were over and you had to bid good bye to Topaz as you moved on out of the dorms and back into the hotel to await your notification from the school for your grades and when your graduation ceremony would be, which turns out took two months to be settled. In the middle of March, waiting there to be called on stage from within the front of the school building just to get that small piece of paper from Mr. Flake. You weren't too bothered by it. It was just like your highschool graduation after all. You also thought you saw Elsa in the crowd but you were probably just seeing things. Which left you with trying to figure out what was left to do while waiting for Gordie to return, so you prayed to Arceus to give you something to do other than continue your job at Bob's Your Uncle and living in a hotel room waiting for Gordie to return. And as if Arceus himself was listening, you found the best answer you could ask for.

You were just passing by it on your way to work one morning, and you saw the 'For Sale' sign in the window of the local bakery which doubled as someone's home. When you asked the owner about it, turns out they were retiring and selling their home/bakery to move somewhere warmer. This was-...This was it! This was your chance! So OF COURSE you offered to buy the place from the owners before anyone else could, and you thanked Arceus every night when the title of ownership was soon sighed over and placed into your hands. Sure your savings too quite the hit and this place was going to take some work-....Ok. A LOT of work that'd take you a LONG time to get this place up and running again between your job and trying to make this place your own, but things seemed to be looking up for you. So slowly days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months. Spring turned into Summer. Summer turned into Autumn. And Autumn turned into Winter. During all of this the you'd sometimes see one of Gordie's little siblings come to the cafe you still currently worked at, and you made small talk with them and they would relay any more news from Gordie to you. Until one day...one fateful day, you got a call. It was one random day, you were trying to figure out how you were going to hire some construction workers to come and fix up your large kitchen when a familiar ringtone caught your attention as Sparky flew out from your pocket.

"*ZZZZZTTT* Incoming call from Gordie. Do you wish to accept call or decline call?," he asked you.

You stared at him completely stunned. Gordie?....GRODIE WAS CALLING YOU!? You nearly dropped the phone book in your hands in favor of smiling at him. "ACCEPT!! ACCEPT NOW!!" You watched with held breath as the ringing stopped as Sparky accepted the call, "H-Hello!?"

"Y/n?,'' Gordie's voice came through the other side timidly before hearing your voice. "Y/N! My Diamond! Baby! Oh it's so good to hear your voice again!"

"My voice? What about yours?! I haven't heard from you in forever!" You instantly smiled. "Where have you been?!"

A tired sigh came from the other side. "It's a long story. There's been a lot of bandits and villains in this region this last year-"

"Villains and bandits!?"

"D-Don't worry! Everyone's ok, but a lotta the events have been pushed back because of 'em. That's why it's been takin' longer than usual for us to come home. I just wanted to call and make sure you were aware o' that."

Ah. That made sense...you guessed. "Well...at least it's all handled. But when are you all coming home?"

"That's just it! That's the good news! We're comin' home in two months!"

"T-Two months!?" Your draw practically dropped in both shock...and absolute happiness. "T-T-That soon!? You mean it!"

"Yeah! That soon! *sigh* It's gonna be so good to see you and my family again...I miss you so much."

"I miss you too."

More time passed. New Year's came and went and you went into January with a much better feeling. Gordie would soon return now, just after December. It made you start putting a smile on your face and a pep in your step again waiting for the day he'd finally return. It seemed all good things were happening to you now. Your bakery was starting to come put together more too, soon you'd actually be able to start baking and selling goods. And then it was FINALLY the end of the year! The day all the Master League finally took place was here and everyone gathered around the cafe including you to watch the hours long battling between trainers and gym leaders and champions from around the world! You saw Piers in one battle and Gloria in another and then there was Gordie who you paid very much attention too. He certainly made it very fair. To the third round in fact before he lost to the Sinnoh Champion Cynthia who proceeded onto the second to last round. It did hurt a little watching him fail so close to the finally but he did make it very, very far into the event and he tried his best which was all that mattered. The entire event ended in a tie between your very own Unbeatable Champion and Cynthia who didn't look the least bit bothered by sharing the winning title with another Champion. And soon after the event was over...Which meant one thing-

GORDIE WAS COMING HOME SOON!!

The thought made you as giddy as a munchlax at an all you can eat buffet. You counted the days as they all started slowly counting down to Gordie's eventually arrival back in Circhester, and then it happened. You were working and it was noon time. There you were just wiping down one of the tables near the windows when you both saw and felt it. People. LOTS of people running down the streets towards the entrance to Circhester and you were confused. Confused you went out of the store to take a look yourself and you froze when seeing it. A GIANT black bird just a little ways in the distance was coming forward towards the town and in it's claws was a taxi. That could only mean one person. GORDIE. Gordie was finally back! Before you could even stop yourself you found yourself running in the crowd all the way towards the entrance to Circhester where the taxi landed and you fought and pushed your way past people to the front as the Taxi door opened and someone with blonde-white hair stepped out and everyone cheered.

A smile graced the man's features as he gave a lighthearted but tired wave knowing the borage of questions and insisting a party be held thrown at him as he and his mother were swarmed by people. Blue eyes darting around before meeting eyes of all colors one after another until a single woman pushed her way to the front and he froze. Panting and tired, f/c eyes looked up to meet long lost blue ones. And the earth stood still for a moment. Neither moving an inch. Before in an instant you felt strong arms wrap around yourself and you gladly returned the warm embrace giving to you held close by the taller man before you. More cheers echoing out.

Soft tears fell from the man's eyes as he softly cried hold getting tighter slightly and a smile appeared on his features.

"My diamond."

[duckielover151]

Am I the only one who didn't hate the live action trailer? (I saw some more postive/mixed feelings reviews going up throughout the day. I guess it's a lot faster to just be unwaveringly negative.)

I haven't made it any secret that I really hope this series works out... But for the most part, I really didn't see much to be disappointed about here. I feel like the little details people are griping about are gonna be a on a case by case basis... (I really don't care about the sandals thing. But if they can do Buggy's makeup like that... they absolutely could have drawn on Sanji's swirly eyebrows.)

There's really only one thing I'm concerned about...

Not that long ago, I reblogged a post dissecting the idea that the endless quips you see in movies like... every entry in the Marvel franchise, for instance, are the death of storytelling and comedy in modern movies. What that post basically boils down to is that that particular style of comedy is damaging mainly because a cast of diverse characters with different backgrounds and personalities and experiences shouldn't all have the same sense of humor. Constantly shoving in the director's personal sense of humor can be 4th wall breaking in a jarring, uncomfortable way. It's about being aware of your characters' individual voices.

I saw a bit of that snarky, quippy vibe in this trailer. I think that works for someone like Nami. And I could see some really good banter of that variety between her and Usopp once they settle into that friendship a bit. But I do worry about what it's going to do for Zoro's characterization.

Something I see missing from this trailer is Zoro's immediate blind loyalty to Luffy, even when following his orders doesn't seem logical. I'd argue especially when following his orders doesn't seem logical. That's a really important component of who Zoro is to me. He's got a simplicity that really complements Luffy. It's part of why the crew runs as well as it does.

But I'm doing my best to remain optimistic. There's been so much talk about how Oda's been involved in every step of this process and how he won't let it be released until it gets his approval. I have to believe he wouldn't have let one of his most important character's characterization get too far off base.

Looking forward to August 31st!

[castlebyersafterdark]

Are you ever afraid we could be wrong and that we’re putting too much faith into what is as of right now technically still an unproven theory that challenges conventional wisdom about one of the most-watched shows on television and based on the assumption that Duffers are very in-tune with queer subtext… but what if they’re not? Like I really believe Byler makes perfect sense but sometimes I wonder if it’s too good to be true and I start to freak out

I'm saving that reaction until the show itself airs. Totally totally honest? Once I settled on my theories and predictions for the show, I pretty much locked in. Because it's not fun for me to focus on doom and gloom and negative thoughts. I just want to enjoy. I don't think it's too good to be true because I honestly think this is what the show told us the direction it's taking. I wouldn't have reached believing in Byler endgame if it wasn't for that because it wasn't any other outside force that told me. I watched the show normal and casual and this is what I took away from it. If the show didn't want me to think Will and Mike are gonna get together then it shouldn't have been written to give context clues that do that 😆

Because yeah a lot of stuff in media has burned us, but also a lot in recent years hasn't. So it's not far-fetched these days. And it's the Duffers but it's also a whole writing team. They're not alone in crafting this, so detailed ideas will be group crafted and coded. The intricacies are there. Just because it's for a wide audience doesn't mean the shows gotta be simple or dumbed down.

You can say it's naivety to set the bar this high but I'm not going to settle for less. And I'm protecting my own emotions to not personally jump into the doubt cycle, we're so back it's so over we're so back... no thanks. Just not enjoyable for me. The show airs and the worst comes to pass? Yall probably won't hear from me for a week or two while my brain recalibrate, I'll dive into several sad and shocked thinkpieces, then I'll get on with fandom fix-it content until the end of obsession. But I don't really dwell on that because the contingency plan doesn't serve the narrative! I try to just have faith in what I feel the story has laid the pathway for, and peek down the road instead of constantly looking over my shoulder.

[echantedtoon]

Diamond In The Rough Ch15 Settling Down In Circhester P4

Gordie paused and he slowly looked up to Elsa. "It's okayin' my transfer to where?"

Her response was to turn the paper around with the official seal and the fancy writing and held it up to his blinking face. "It's okayin' our temporary transfer to the Pasio Region! You've been chosen to compete in the Masters League!" A bright smile was beaming on her face and her eyes were starry like, "Well...actually only you an Mum's been chosen."

Her big brother didn't answer at first instead taking the letter from Her and immediately opened it, breaking the seal and opening the folded paper to let eyes dance across the words plastered across it. It was thick too. The reason why was because there was already a passport, cruise ticket, and everything else he needed to take a trip overseas along with the very long and very detailed explanation from the Chairwoman in the letter for the Masters League and that he'd be going to Pasio for-....

"A whole year!?"

Elsa perked up hearing Gordie's voice and found her big brother staring at the paper wide eyed in disbelief. "Wha- No. Just ten months but almost a year! And you're leavin' at the end of this month! Isn't it exciting, Gordie?"....She blinked as Gordie still stared at the letter in his hands. "Oi! Are you alright?"

Gordie finally blinked to her before opening his mouth, closing his mouth, and then looking back to the letter. "I-...Y-Yeah..I'm good." He beamed a smile at her again. "This is great news, Elsa! C'mon. H-Help me hang up these tinsels then we can set up the Christmas tree."

He distracted himself by setting up the Christmas decorations and having dinner with his family before taking time out to actually look at everything he was sent. The Prince had found his battling exceptional and thus had picked him along with a few other Gym Leaders, his mother included, to come compete in the Masters League. And they were leaving right after the Christmas holiday. His FIRST Christmas he wanted to celebrate with YOU!! He wasn't expecting this so soon! How was he even supposed to break the news to you!? Well...Turns out he had to break it to you sooner rather than later when you came to visit him unexpectedly and by then he decided to rip off the band aid and tell you what exactly was going on. Your reaction was as expected when he showed you the official letter from the Chairwoman and felt guilty as your face went from happy to shocked. 

"W-What!? You're gonna be gone for THAT long!?"

"Y-Yeah." He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly and guiltily. "*sigh* It's not like I was expectin' it either." He felt terrible about all of this. He wouldn't be there to watch you graduate or spend New Years' Eve with you or spend so many other holidays with you. "But..This 's a big opportunity for Galar and for everyone else. I-...I was thinkin' about it and I think it would be best if I went, but I couldn't leave without tellin' ya."

"W-What about your brothers and sister?," you pointed out, "With both of you gone, who's going to look after them? And your gyms?"

"Dontcha worry. We already got our workers ta look after the gym, an' as for my sibs, a good family friend of my ma's is comin' over to watch 'em all for us! She's really great with kids and has watched them before. So they'll be well taken cared of. It's...I-It's what you thought about all this that worried me the most. Long distance in a relationship d-doesn't sound like something you'd like."

You nodded. "You're right. It's not something I like." He seemed to look dejected for a second before you reached out for him. One hand grabbing his and the other coming up to cup his cheek to make him look at you again. "But it shouldn't make you not want to go. I want you to go if you want to! I think you'd be great out there in the pokemon league! I love you and I won't hold you back."

With each word you spoke, his eyes went wider and wider until he stared at you like an owl. Until he smiled, chuckled, and allowed himself to lean into your hands. "Now I know why I fell for ya in the first place.~ I love ya so much."

"I love you too. And I want to do something to make things less stressful for you."

"Jus' spend time with me," he answered pulling your hand closer to his heart and leaning into your own touch. "That's all I ask for. It's all I want for us."

"Then that's what I'll do. In fact, I'll do you one better."

Something soft grabbed his hand and he froze still staring at the snowy ground beneath his feet. A sight he was hesitant to leave when he turned back to look at you again. Huh. And you were both closer than he remembered. Just a few inches from one another twinkling under the lights. And you blinked at the sudden closeness too. Face going a dim pink and a few chuckles from the moment escaping you. Barely anyone was outside now, or pokemon for that matter. So it was just you two. Alone out here with nothing but each other for company. His mind felt completely blank and numb but in a good way, compelling him to reach his hands up and cup a cheek of yours something his rational brain wouldn't allow himself to do. Inches away now. You didn't move away. He stared at the woman in front of him, this woman with the beautifully flowing hair and the cute smile. If he was watching this as an outsider, he would've laughed at how they were literally just strangers less than a while ago, but right now it didn't seem any of that or anything else mattered. The wind blew some more rustling the snowflakes and blowing some of that pretty hair into his face, which he immediately reached to pull away and Y/n made no move to stop him from doing that. Or removing the hand that now cupped her cheek. Maybe it really was a mutual madness they both shared or some form of chaos in their lives, but right now....With them being so close...And so vulnerable. It was only natural of course-.. It's what soulmates do-.. Of course they would since-...

They kissed.

Gordie was leaving. For a full year, and he wouldn't be back until the very next year. You were in shock when he first broke the news to you, then heartbroken. You guys were just starting out and now he had to go away for another full year!? It wasn't fair! But there wasn't anything either of you could do anything about it. After all this was a big opportunity for him and it was an honor to compete in the very first ever Master's League so...You understood. That doesn't mean you didn't like it though. Gordie was one of the first Galar gym leaders to leave. He had one month to prepare to go on this extended trip so he spent it filling out the required paperwork, packing, and spending as much time with you and his siblings as possible. That's right. You weren't the only one who was upset he'd be gone for such a long time. And then soon it was time for him to leave at the end of the month. He'd be heading to Hulbury to catch a ship which would take him to the Pasio Region. Almost all of Circhester had gathered to see off their gym leaders which was filled with a few congratulations and goodbyes. He made sure to hug the triplets and Elsa good bye.

"Keep an eye on the gym and don't worry about paying the staff alright? The Chairwoman's already taking care of that for me. Be good for Auntie Sally ok?," Melony was fussing over her children like any mother would.  "Don't be out late and don't go anywhere without telling Auntie Sally first. You just make sure you do good in school and don't let Snowball in the house again! "

He then turned to you when all was said and done and you two stared at each other for a silent moment, before he held his arms out offering you a hug and you gladly took it wrapping your arms around his middle and him hugging you back.

"And YOU be careful living out there," he mumbled, "I don't want you getting hurt again and I can't be here to help you. Just the thought of that happenin' makes me mad I gotta go. If ya need anythin' call me. I don't care 'bout the stupid Masters League. I'll swim across the ocean and come back if I have too."

You chuckled. "Don't be so dramatic. I'll be fine. You just go and show everyone what you can do. Besides it's only until next year right? It won't be that long."

Although it would sure feel like it. He then left. Picking up his suitcase and giving the crowd one last good bye before he entered the taxi and took off for Hulbury leaving you to stand there and just watch it before it faded into the tiniest black speck, and then into nothing.

The following months were peaceful but almost bland and boring as you settled into a routine. Get up, go to school, get homework done, and then come back home. All day every day. You still on instinct looked over your shoulder expecting Gordie to be knocking at your door any moment to visit but he never did and you would feel disappointed. You still gone off in your life. Most of the hard assignments was over. School didn't end until around the end of February so those last two months of school kept you busy and helped to keep your mind off things, and it all went ok. Gordie had left one last gift to you before he left, he had message your battle studies teacher and attested to witnessing you catching three of your pokemon which was proof enough to help you pass that assignment. You'd be sure to make up that kindness to him later when he came back. But soon even the classes were over and you had to bid good bye to Topaz as you moved on out of the dorms and back into the hotel to await your notification from the school for your grades and when your graduation ceremony would be, which turns out took two months to be settled. In the middle of March, waiting there to be called on stage from within the front of the school building just to get that small piece of paper from Mr. Flake. You weren't too bothered by it. It was just like your highschool graduation after all. You also thought you saw Elsa in the crowd but you were probably just seeing things. Which left you with trying to figure out what was left to do while waiting for Gordie to return, so you prayed to Arceus to give you something to do other than continue your job at Bob's Your Uncle and living in a hotel room waiting for Gordie to return. And as if Arceus himself was listening, you found the best answer you could ask for.

You were just passing by it on your way to work one morning, and you saw the 'For Sale' sign in the window of the local bakery which doubled as someone's home. When you asked the owner about it, turns out they were retiring and selling their home/bakery to move somewhere warmer. This was-...This was it! This was your chance! So OF COURSE you offered to buy the place from the owners before anyone else could, and you thanked Arceus every night when the title of ownership was soon sighed over and placed into your hands. Sure your savings too quite the hit and this place was going to take some work-....Ok. A LOT of work that'd take you a LONG time to get this place up and running again between your job and trying to make this place your own, but things seemed to be looking up for you. So slowly days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months. Spring turned into Summer. Summer turned into Autumn. And Autumn turned into Winter. During all of this the you'd sometimes see one of Gordie's little siblings come to the cafe you still currently worked at, and you made small talk with them and they would relay any more news from Gordie to you. Until one day...one fateful day, you got a call. It was one random day, you were trying to figure out how you were going to hire some construction workers to come and fix up your large kitchen when a familiar ringtone caught your attention as Sparky flew out from your pocket.

"*ZZZZZTTT* Incoming call from Gordie. Do you wish to accept call or decline call?," he asked you.

You stared at him completely stunned. Gordie?....GRODIE WAS CALLING YOU!? You nearly dropped the phone book in your hands in favor of smiling at him. "ACCEPT!! ACCEPT NOW!!" You watched with held breath as the ringing stopped as Sparky accepted the call, "H-Hello!?"

"Y/n?,'' Gordie's voice came through the other side timidly before hearing your voice. "Y/N! My Diamond! Baby! Oh it's so good to hear your voice again!"

"My voice? What about yours?! I haven't heard from you in forever!" You instantly smiled. "Where have you been?!"

A tired sigh came from the other side. "It's a long story. There's been a lot of bandits and villains in this region this last year-"

"Villains and bandits!?"

"D-Don't worry! Everyone's ok, but a lotta the events have been pushed back because of 'em. That's why it's been takin' longer than usual for us to come home. I just wanted to call and make sure you were aware o' that."

Ah. That made sense...you guessed. "Well...at least it's all handled. But when are you all coming home?"

"That's just it! That's the good news! We're comin' home in two months!"

"T-Two months!?" Your draw practically dropped in both shock...and absolute happiness. "T-T-That soon!? You mean it!"

"Yeah! That soon! *sigh* It's gonna be so good to see you and my family again...I miss you so much."

"I miss you too."

More time passed. New Year's came and went and you went into January with a much better feeling. Gordie would soon return now, just after December. It made you start putting a smile on your face and a pep in your step again waiting for the day he'd finally return. It seemed all good things were happening to you now. Your bakery was starting to come put together more too, soon you'd actually be able to start baking and selling goods. And then it was FINALLY the end of the year! The day all the Master League finally took place was here and everyone gathered around the cafe including you to watch the hours long battling between trainers and gym leaders and champions from around the world! You saw Piers in one battle and Gloria in another and then there was Gordie who you paid very much attention too. He certainly made it very fair. To the third round in fact before he lost to the Sinnoh Champion Cynthia who proceeded onto the second to last round. It did hurt a little watching him fail so close to the finally but he did make it very, very far into the event and he tried his best which was all that mattered. The entire event ended in a tie between your very own Unbeatable Champion and Cynthia who didn't look the least bit bothered by sharing the winning title with another Champion. And soon after the event was over...Which meant one thing-

GORDIE WAS COMING HOME SOON!!

The thought made you as giddy as a munchlax at an all you can eat buffet. You counted the days as they all started slowly counting down to Gordie's eventually arrival back in Circhester, and then it happened. You were working and it was noon time. There you were just wiping down one of the tables near the windows when you both saw and felt it. People. LOTS of people running down the streets towards the entrance to Circhester and you were confused. Confused you went out of the store to take a look yourself and you froze when seeing it. A GIANT black bird just a little ways in the distance was coming forward towards the town and in it's claws was a taxi. That could only mean one person. GORDIE. Gordie was finally back! Before you could even stop yourself you found yourself running in the crowd all the way towards the entrance to Circhester where the taxi landed and you fought and pushed your way past people to the front as the Taxi door opened and someone with blonde-white hair stepped out and everyone cheered.

A smile graced the man's features as he gave a lighthearted but tired wave knowing the borage of questions and insisting a party be held thrown at him as he and his mother were swarmed by people. Blue eyes darting around before meeting eyes of all colors one after another until a single woman pushed her way to the front and he froze. Panting and tired, f/c eyes looked up to meet long lost blue ones. And the earth stood still for a moment. Neither moving an inch. Before in an instant you felt strong arms wrap around yourself and you gladly returned the warm embrace giving to you held close by the taller man before you. More cheers echoing out.

Soft tears fell from the man's eyes as he softly cried hold getting tighter slightly and a smile appeared on his features.

"My diamond."

[scatcrccio]

GRIEF WAS BOTH A TERRIFYING YET INTERESTING SORT OF CONCEPT in and of itself— just another way for one's mind to fuck with you at the most inconvenient moments. As soon as you think it's gone, BAM! It's there, unpredictable and overwhelming. Nat sees the tables of thought running in Van's mind the second their eyes catch sight of one another and it shouldn't have surprised her when that look of shock almost immediately shifts into an attempt to portray a more customer service type persona. Ignoring all of the obvious signs of who was standing directly in front of them, real and in the flesh, because of course, it was impossible as far as Van was concerned, certainly.

Nat couldn't very well expect them to recognize her right away or rather, wouldn't acknowledge it immediately out of common sense and logic considering she had seen Natalie die. Gone to the funeral, paid her respects and felt that sting of sorrow in the process. With that in mind, Nat doesn't take offense to the reaction and instead, offers up a small smile of her own in return because yeah, for all Van knew, the woman standing there could've been nothing more than a doppelgänger of her late, former teammate. She wonders if she should keep up the charade a bit as to not overwhelm her too much and yet, that would have been crueler in the long run. Bad enough that Natalie had to lie to her friends in order to make her own death believable and asked Misty to do the same.

❝ Oh, I'm sure you do. ❞ She starts off with a bit of a nervous chuckle, hands still secure in her pockets as a safety net of sorts, allowing for fingers to remain tense and slightly curled beneath their confinement. ❝ But I'm not here for any of that, Van. ❞ This was going to be a lot harder than she thought it would and suddenly she feels her palms becoming moist with the rising heat boiling through skin. Anticipation and fear causing nerves to tingle as she takes a few steps forward. There's no sound of rustling from upstairs which gives Nat the indication that they are in fact, alone in the store together and at least, that was a plus.

❝ I-... uh, look, I don't really know how to properly go about this so I'm just gonna be upfront with you. ❞ Eyes glanced down towards her feet with every little shuffle before moving off to the side and then finally settling back towards the redhead when she speaks. ❝ It's me, okay—? Natalie. Or, well, Natasha now, still Nat but, we can get into those details later. ❞ Internally, she's bracing herself for the inevitable backlash should there be any because she really doesn't know what to expect from the other woman. A mixture of emotions would follow for the both of them and it's another game of roulette at this point. ❝ I just... I just wanted to talk. Can we do that? I know I have a lot of explaining to do. ❞

Van bent down to file away the end of day’s receipts after she’d counted the register and nearly completed the closing processes of her small store. It was a Friday, the busiest day of the week for her as people prepared for their weekends and their movie nights, which meant that she would be able to pay her bills that week as well have a busy Monday ahead to process all the returns. She wasn’t complaining, she liked having something to do, and she loved that her store was gaining a bit of regular foot traffic like she’d dreamed. However, she was starting to flag in energy as the day drew to a close, and she was looking forward to locking the door and flipping the sign to ‘closed’ so that she could go upstairs, make a monstrous milkshake of donuts and caramel syrup that she had on her kitchen bench, and watch a movie she’d been searching for on VHS for months and finally found the day prior. 

The bell above her shop door jingling was unexpected this close to closing, and Van closed her eyes in a moment of frustration and let out a soft sigh before plastering a friendly customer service smile to her face and straightening up behind the counter to greet the customer. The person standing in the middle of her store was familiar enough that the welcoming greeting died on her throat and the customer service smile froze on her lips. 

After Nat’s death nearly a year ago, Van had often thought she’d see her in glimpses of strangers. The shape of her lips, the way she walked, the style of her hair. All things she’d considered so uniquely Natalie were cropping up in strangers everywhere. She’d grown used to the heartbreaking disappointment that came with remembering Nat was dead and gone. She’d seen Nat die. 

The woman in the middle of her store had longer hair, and she didn’t look like she was about to fade away into oblivion beneath the leather jacket she wore, but those eyes were so startlingly familiar and recognisable that for a moment, Van could have sworn Natalie was staring right at her. That was impossible, and although Van was used to impossible and inexplicable things, some things were just too hard to believe, even for her. 

The voice sent a shiver down Van’s spine, a typical side effect from being haunted, and it took a moment for Van to react to the words that had been spoken as opposed to the voice they’d been said in. She raised an eyebrow at the newcomer, wondering what had driven such a statement, and managed to tear her gaze away to glance around her labour of love. 

“Yeah, it is pretty cool, and going strong,” she agreed carefully. “Um, is there something you’re after? I’m about to close up…” she invited, unsure if she actually wanted this woman to stay and hire something. Still, Van wasn’t in the habit of turning people away no matter what memories or aching feelings they stir inside her, so she stepped around the counter to walk a little closer and kept her body language and facial expression as welcoming and warm as she could. “If you like the fifties Greaser aesthetic, I have a couple recommendations for you,” Van said with a soft teasing lilt, inclining her head to indicate the leather jacket the other woman was wearing.

[familyagrestefanblog]

My real talk about the one factor that hinders me from being able to properly enjoy the Ladynoir reconciliation and what season 5 has to serioulsy make up for:

The reason why I'm not alright with how both "Kuro Neko" and even "Strike Back" to some large extent have the Ladynoir make up scenes go down is because both have Chat Noir forgive Ladybug and settle everything in her favor while Marinette is still leaving him completely oblivious to the massive involvement Alya had in this season when that is literally the other core aspect (besides Chat Blanc) that caused Chat Noir to be continously neglected, highly endangerd and basically replaced as Ladybugs partner and reduced to temporary hero status the entire season through. Non of this was revealed, non of this was resolved, all of this is still very much around and was turned into and used as a noose to silence Chat Noir with prior to the end, Marinette just once again didn't had to face it narratively wise because Chat Noir couldn't bring it up under Risks influence because how the hell could he when he doesn't know that these factors that were excessively played against him the entire time even exist?

I talk about this in much more detail in THIS post here I wrote before "Strike Back" aired, and I'm gonna be honest here, basically non of this was resolved. Adrien still knows NOTHING of the entire Alya/Rena Furtive situation and what part it played in his justified pain this season. All he knows is that Ladybug had Rena somewhere hidden on the battle field when "Strike Back" attacked. That's all and that's basically nothing because NOTHING was revealed and explained to him. Ladynoir may have fought in the episode but it actually didn't do anything. She didn't tell him shit. He remains oblivious to EVERYTHING that Ladybug actually DID this season behind his back and to all her secrets and that's also the state he once again forgives her in: in complete obliviousness.

Adrien is once again not given the needed informations to have his forgiveness actually MEAN something in the long run. Just like in "Kuro Neko" Adrien doesn't know what he is Ladybug actually forgiving for, he is just made to do it to her favor. His perception of the reality of this conflict is still left highly incomplete and I'm sorry, but I just don't view this as enough for the damn RESOLUTION of the conflict from this season. Adriens perception of their entire Ladynoir conflict remains limited and purposefully manipulated because she told him nothing of Alya, Su-Han after Furious Fu and Chat Blanc and I'M HONESTLY SORRY but that is NEEDED for this conflict to be actually Fairly and properly settled. This. is. not. settled. No matter what Canon will pretend in future.

When Adrien is never given the actual context of why people have hurt him, what actually happened to cause his pain and the changes for which he had to take every single fall for and he then just continues to forgive them anyway because his lack of knowledge makes everything seem more forgivable then it will never actually mean what it should mean. Adrien forgiving Ladybug in "Hack-San", "Kuro Neko" and "Strike Back" and even more Idk right now honestly hardly means anything because he. does. not. KNOW. And his forgiveness refers to other circumstances he believes her in. I said what I said.

No this is not Marinette salt, no i don't hate her, quit it. All I'm saying is that I'm beyond annoyed that people say that the entire Ladynoir conflict was settled oh so nicely and is now done with "Strike Back" when it really REALLY god damn shouldn't. How can a whole season of a conflict be settled when the season ends with him still knowing nothing?? How can Adriens words in these episodes even MEAN anything when he's forgiving her for very different circumstances from his perspective and she just leaves him in this obliviousness?

I honestly don't even care right now if the narrative is ever going to properly set this right since "Kuro Neko" has really killed my faith in the show in this regard, but I definitely WILL continue to hold the narrative accountable for all of this. This is not enough because it legitimately invalidated Adriens forgiveness to a huge degree. Adrien did not actually made a choice here. He cannot chose to forgive something he doesn't know about. I'm not saying that I don't want Marinette to be forgiven that's nonsense quit twisting my words. Chat Noir forgiving Ladybug is always what I wanted as well and I WISHED the situation was easier than this, but as it stands right now I cannot say with a clear conscious that the forgiveness Adrien gave Ladybug actually means what we all want it to be. It literally can't. She is still keeping everything from him and has now received for the second time complete forgiveness in her favor for that. Man I absolutely don't want this girl in any more pain than she already is but this is just not how forgiveness works. He has to KNOW about the things she still keeps secret from him for that. His knowledge he bases his forgiveness on just doesn't add up to the actual events of this season that need to be forgiven as Marinette herself outright states in the end.

She says that out of all people HE should have abandoned her first after what she did but then he doesn't. And that is such a sweet and powerful moment if only these two were actually on the same damn page but they aren't. Because SHE knows what she did all season but HE still doesn't even know half of it, much less the neck-breakers she is actually referring to.

It just doesn't work. These two reconciling through a deep bond that can survive even the worst circumstances because in the end they always pull through for each other was the ideal outcome here, and it's the one I WISHED more than anything were actually the case but it's just not. Because that had required that Adrien had actually found out about all of her secrets from this season. Him saying "yes" hardly means alot when he is kept in such an excessive state of obliviousness that "no" isn't really an option for him anymore to choose from his perspective. A "yes" without a proper "no" as a second option is not actually a "yes" and that is basically what "Kuro Neko" and "Strike Back" too did to Adrien/Chat Noir and I'm so upset about this because both him and Marinette deserved so much better than this.

Season 5 seriously has to fix this, this is just not how any of this works. And no I will not just shut up about it and get over it, I’m voicing legit critizism about the way the narrative handles literally the BACKBONE of its own show. Critizism I’m not alone with since people have legit given up on the show over the way the Ladynoir conflict was handled this season and tbh I cant blame them. This season was painful to get through as a fandom, especially near the end, and that isnt just nothing to critizise.

There I said it.

[bemylord]

↠ toji with a virgin s/o ↞

pairing: toji fushiguro x fem!reader.

warnings: nsfw, aged up, size kink [?], oral [fem!receiving], virgin reader, first time, lost of virginity, praising, toji calls himself daddy, grammar errors.

word counter: 3.2k

rq: I would like to request a oneshot? a hc would be appreciated too though. Toji with a virgin gf who can’t even make herself cum? Just how he would like to destroy her :)

butler's remark: (◕‿◕) hello lord, i'm back with an oneshot with toji being tremendously tender with his lover for the first time. in addition, reader is a citizen. sorry, i did it soft, bc i think toji will super-extra-super soft for the first time with his s/o, only for the first. i hope you'll like that, thanks for the request ;)

disclaimer: everything you read is purely my opinion - any detail, sketch, or event is a figment of my imagination.

you've been an ordinary citizen and had never planned to date a sorcerer or someone close to this specialty. you ain't cowardly, merely as you were thinking you'll marry a simple man and will have kids with him, and die in one day like lovebirds.

you had never considered yourself being stuck in a relationship with a sorcerer killer.

you were overworked, virtually sleeping as were walking in the empty street, dreaming to get home as soon as possible, to feel the silk sheets against your back. the area where your office was located had little street lighting, although, you hadn't felt the anxiety of being robbed or something worse. the day went lingeringly and horrible due to the boss who declared you as a temporary deputy, piled you up with a stack of papers.

but, this is life, anything might happen. all of a sudden, you overheard something behind you but as you looked back - there was nobody, as soon as you turn your head to the starting position, you saw a young, skinny man who is holding a knife in his hand.

'hmm~ look who's here, a young, gorgeous lady..' he said with his disgusting, lewd voice, coming closer to you. 'would you mind playing with me? don't be shy or els-'

you have a perky personality, no doubt, but because of how hard the day was, you had one option - run for the hills. before you could do any movements as if hit the man or run away, something prompt hit him, like a swift meteorite that you couldn't see. a cloud of dust grew around you and the man, so you hide your face in the elbow curve, covering your mouth with another hand.

as soon as the dust had settled, in front of you opened up on the view of an adult man. he was high, had an athletic, broad-shouldered, pretty impressive figure. your savior held the blade in one hand, flopped on his back.

'he ran away like a coward. don't worry, girl, you saved, thanks to me' he laughed, he stroked himself on the shoulder, as were about to leave the dead body.

'no i'm not! i'd have protected myself on my own'

you refuted his smugness, watching as he slowly moves his torso in your way, flaunting his outlining muscles through the fabric of the black t-shirt. his complacent eyes and the sharp scar over the right side of the mouth on the edge of his lips. you took a deep breath, continuing on your path as he isn't standing there, not hadn't protected you.

'you're too weak to beat even him, if not me, you'd be-'

'i am stronger as i may look'

he giggled, in a flash stood in front of you, bending over to your face, by finger tugs your face up to look at him directly in eyes, smirked.

'are you sure, girl?'

those green, almost emerald, but cold eyes looked directly into yours as two faces were as closed as you could kiss his lips.

'i'll walk you home'

'i don't want to, and anyway, maybe you're his partner in crime, leave me alon-'

previous to you had finished your phrase, he threw your tiny body on his shoulder, leisurely walking, better say, carrying you home. you beat his back, softly reminiscent of a parody of the word 'let me go, moron, i can walk by myself'

'tch, fine, idiot,' he deliberately shrugged his shoulder to close your mouth as heard the name you had given him. 'by the way, what's your name or you prefer the name idiot?' you said sarcastically.

'for you it's toji'

well.

as a result of your crawl and also being talkative when clearly you shouldn't be, you ended up being in a relationship with a man, who'd obviously fuck you on the first date, as it may count as a 'date', anywhere-anytime, by the way.

although you wouldn't ever say he isn't hot or sexy, conversely, you willingly allow him to breed, precisely you'd beg toji to breed you on the straightaway on the cervix, but for one thing.

you're a virgin.

hilariously - it's true. nothing bad to be in your age a virgin, but if you weren't dating toji it'd fine: his dirty jokes and lustful eyes which are maddening you insane, also his fucking athletic body which is outlining through the t-shirt or white cotton shirt [he wear it once] you thought he did it purposely: he knew your secret, undoubtedly could sniff your chaste nature as if you can emit fragrance.

on the second date, it had been nine days since you got acquainted with him, as you moved in with him. toji was exceedingly obsessed with every step of yours - he followed you from the work, in the mall or market, for your security and control every guy who'd be close to you.

although, you couldn't hide your addiction - he's a drug you should be careful with or you might be addicted as if you ain't. he isn't wearing pants in home, walking in front of you solely in underwear. he could walk from the shower in a terry towel wrapped around his torso as he buries his hands in his dark hair mess it up.

'what are you looking at, girl?'

you couldn't take your eyes off his bulging..

'you. just you. i'm gonna cook dinner, something.. special?'

'eggs, baby'

fushiguro put hands above the door frame, exhale and tensed every muscle, narrowing predatory eyes as you were the extraction he was target for. you're laying on his king size bed [lol i'm sorry i'm out], wondering is everything he has gotten measured in king size as he interupted your reflection by putting the knee on the edge of the bed.

'mine. in your pussy'

as if you're bewitched - you couldn't talk, just contemplate as he leisurely moves towards you. you couldn't contravene as he tugs your face to ogle in your absentminded eyes as you're avoiding his gaze, looking at the ceiling or door or even window. not. at. his. bulge.

your heart had stuck in your throat when toji ran his hand under his shirt, certainly, he has a kink of dominion, when he suddenly stopped. despite of your uncertainty and timid of subsequent play, you looked at his emerald eyes as he licks his lips with a tongue.

'are you sure, baby girl? i mean, it's your first time after all'

you quell your forthcoming question staring deeply into lascivious eyes, put hands on his massive shoulders. as you anticipated, his cock twitched as toji letting out a low groan in your ear, kissing your temple. you're absentmindedly running finger pads on his back, not knowing the proximity of bodies that are readiness wanted to intertwine together. not knowing how much it turns him on.

'stop me if i go crazy over your body, okay?'

as if. as if you dare would rip out his tongue off your crotch as he makes you his woman. toji left on your red cheeks quick kisses, took off the towel. you shut your eyes tight, still holding his shoulders barely squeeze them, letting out a hushed moan.

after you quelled your moan, toji touched your lips against his one, running fingers on your lower stomach to the cup of the breast without touching the hard nipple. light movements mixed with his muted groans. his pads deftly touched one areola as you emitted a sharp purr, arching your back a little as a dulcet sign for toji.

you dug your fingers into toji's back, as he put a finger on your hard nipple, holding himself as to grab your tits and clench it in his large hand.

you gasp for the air as if there was a catastrophic shortage of it due to the pressed body of toji. you responded at his deep kiss, wrapping hands around his neck, apparently begging for something more.

he pulled away from the kiss just to take off the shirt he has given you, baring your untouched by no one but him tits, leading palms onto breasts, skipping nipples between the gaps through fingers. he reached down to your lips to give a bit of warning kiss as he slightly bit your lip, kissing all the way down to your collarbone, finally leaving there manifestations of hickeys.

for how long toji has been stopped from leaving on your stunning skin his marks? it seems it has been absolutely not many days but toji, as you may see, clearly has to leave labels on your neck.

he dug his teeth into your neck, frantically wants your area to be dotted by him as a token for everyone meaning: she's taken, dude, don't mess up with her.

for how long toji has been stopped from touching your sensitive area as having been feel warmth and tenderness is emitted from your body?

toji squeezes your nipple imponderable, to make you feel some kind of power over you becoming submitted by toji fushiguro, a sorcerer killer, a man who owned you, spinning the pea between pads, making you let out whimpers.

'you drive me insane, little one,' he approached his face close to the breasts, touched your pea with his tongue cautiously, as not to frighten you away. 'i'm gonna make your pussy drool beneath me, completely own you as my little girl'

you feel yourself gush beneath him, burying hands in his messy hair as your breath has stuck in the throat as toji snuggles his lips on your tits, sucking your hard and probably swollen from teasing. fushiguro has made you became wet in your panties as he's moistening your breast, hearing your precipitous whimpers.

'toj-toji, i don't know-'

'tch, little girl, relax your body and let daddy do the rest'

as he pronounced, he moves down, leaving the trace of wet kisses on your stomach, massaging your hips, stopping his action to look at your red face. your chest heaves heavily every time you feel toji's silky lips on your belly as his finger pads caressing your thighs. as if something weighty is resting on your chest you take deep breathes, breathlessly exhaling.

'spread your legs'

you obediently did what he said, hesitating a bit as the only fabric holding him back to bury his mouth against your pussy, assembling all juices, tasting your cum as if it's his meal. he rested kisses on the fabric of panties, couldn't sate with tender kisses he spreads on your body.

deliberately run tongue on your labia through the thin fabric as you were about to push his hand from your crotch as toji grab you by the hips, pulling you closer. he slackens his teasing actions by kissing your inner thighs. as your cunt was lack of attention from toji, you let out a pliant whimper, approximately woefully have purred.

toji's self-restraint thinning as you're silently begging with your eyes and your hands immeasurably are burying in his dark hair. the tip of his tongue deftly sideline panties, flicked it, as he discovered a divine view on your drooling hole.

'stop me now, because i won't be able to hold back later'

teasufully kissing your labia and area around the place he should be playing with as anticipating for some pliant whimpers of you, deliberately showing you he'll lick that swollen clit, pressing a soft kiss on the skin instead. fushi's shattering your hopes of being eating every time he kissed literally everything and lick everywhere besides your hole and clit. he acts like an inexperienced teenager, notwithstanding, you know that toji'd ruin or demolish your holes like a monster.

't-toji..'

'yes, my little girl' he pressed the tip of his tongue on your clit, hearing those moans he's willing to listen for the rest of his life, then take away as you were about to press his mouth back again, digging his tongue deep inside you, although he obviously couldn't reach to your cervix, barely permeate in your hole.

'you want me to eat your little pussy?'

as if you can't talk, you nodded. scarcely reached up to take off the last thing, leisurely pulling down the panties, staring at you as a predator. toji is standing on his knee on the bed, threw your ankles on his shoulders, smooching ankles watching as to how your cheeks are becoming pinky, as you try not to look at his dick. still, you're a timid one, despite your words.

he reached to your face to give you a voluptuous kiss, returning to the starting position.

'look at your pretty pussy'

he kissed your clit in a flash replace into the tongue, making a circles on swollen and needy spot, decisively giving you what've been begging for. running the tip of the tongue on your virgin hole, leaving it for the dessert, returning to your clit.

you'd swear to god you can see stars in the ceiling as toji squeezing your nipples while moistening you. the proximity of his face in your pussy is driving you insane, for the days of cohabitation you understood he isn't a tender one, vice versa, he'd fuck you whenever his dick gets erect. maybe it's a rush of tenderness, maybe it's the fear of hurting his girl. nevertheless, you not scared to give toji full control of your body and bring you to your first orgasm by ripping the hymen. if that's i may call the way he's licking you, it'd be make-out with your pussy, due to his relentless movements by flicking his tongue on the clit.

'baby,' he pulled away from it, as you squeeze a sheet, making your knuckles become whiten as you spread legs wider, watching his mocking grin appeared on the face. 'i'll be gentle' he pressed his lips on your forehead, taking from the bedside table lubrication to low the friction. although, the thought of his dick ripped the hymen, putting all his tenderness in your first time, make your knees get shaken.

he put a soft kiss on your lips, smearing lubrication on his dick, substitute cock on the entrance. abrupt and penetrating pain wavily covered your body as you feel soft lips covered your mouth, blunting the pain with one hand being dug in your hip, painting illegible traces. another hand he put on your cheek, drawing circles with his thumb, waiting till getting used to the pain.

toji will find lots of red stripes from your nails on his back, smirked, as reminiscing about that special night when he made you his woman. his broad back was made merely for you to leave thousand and thousand fingernail impressions every night. toji had let a low groan as he feels as you move fingertips to the neck, exhaling in his chest.

he entered all his dick inside you feeling as your walls compressing the base, getting used to being full with his thick cock. you're indulging at the new, mind-blowing feeling, give him sheepish kisses as you're scared to be rejected. he moves his palm from the cheek to the ear, running fingers through your tangled but soft to the touch. you nudged your hips up, intermittently letting your breath out.

'tch, if you're not feeling well, i can come-'

'more, toji, more'

without breaking up kiss, he pulled out cock to the tip as pulling it again slowly, stretching your walls, touching with the tip your cervix as his balls touching your ass, groaning in the kiss, softly caress your thigh. you moved your palms to the shoulder, touching the musculature, going down to the biceps wrapping his arm as another hand attempting to draw patterns on the back as if it a canvas for you.

you can feel every vein, curve, and the way his tip is expanding gummy walls, as toji diligently coming in, adjusting inside you then pulling out. you're focusing on how full you're with his cock inside, your clarity gradually getting mushed as the sharp pain turning into a pleasurable and delightful feeling. sating to the new feeling might get addiction, but you're far beyond to accept that, surrendering to your lover as he gets addicted to it. you grasp for his shoulders, as he nudged in you, leaving whimpers from your mouth.

'like that, huh?' he pulled his cock out to contemplate as your facial expression have changed: you furrowed eyebrows as felt your hole being empty without thick toji's cock, practically purring like a march cat. 'beg me for it, baby'

what an insatiable man you've got. he licked his lips, looking down on it. your hymen has left blood, as he glanced at you to see his future wife your reaction.

'i-i toji, it's..'

he hummed, returning to your lips, slowly giving back the missing part.

'you okay?' you nodded as a response; he's perceiving fullness as wants to fill you up, but desperately be tempered himself, blaming he didn't wear a condom to do it. a dozen of half-moons will be littering your hips as toji's digging nails, scrambled your mind with squelches pushes in your hole. 'relax, baby girl, i'm here' he thrusts inside the spongy spot, ripping another moan out of you, voluptuous to his ears. 'baby~ you tease me with those moans of yours'

his cock was aimed at a place inside your vagina, with a slow but deep thrust skillfully reaching your cervix, massaging with the tip of his cock that spot. toji's staring at your pleased, satisfied face as he found that needy place of yours.

holding on to the headboard in the bed as support, clutching the sheet with his other hand like the composure he was rapidly losing with each thrust into your hole, formerly virgin cunt, letting out a heavy sigh, tilting his head back.

wiggling the pelvis backward and forwards as heard beneath his body your whimpers, feeling replenishment on his skin to his previous strips, losing remains self-control as your walls have been clenching his cock, as your body gets shaking as his, preparing the body for the coming ecstasy.

'toji, mh~' you tilted the head back on the pillow, wrapping legs around his pelvis, quelling moans while arching back against his chest. you're milked [? correct if i'm wrong] his cock, shuddering. you felt his lips on your cheeks, as he's covering your wet face in kisses, pulling cock out.

'damn, baby, probably-' he stroke his hard cock a couple of times before releasing his cum onto your belly. fushiguro ran fingers from the hairline, wiping beads of sweat from the hairline through hair. 'are you good?'

as you're still catching your breath you rested on your face a slight smile, closing eyes. he giggled, getting out of bed.

'almost made a baby' it took him a second or two, to lift you up in my arms, leading into the bathroom. 'i'm gonna clean you up, my baby. but you could fall asleep in my arms, you did such a good job by taking my cock' he kissed your forehead, wiping your drops of sweat.

'i love you, toji'

he put you on the washing machine, turning away from you to fill the tub. what went unnoticed was his relaxed smile after your phrase.

'i love you more, little one'

(◕‿◕)

↳ back to the main master list.

i feel i made lots of mistakes, like, idk. correct me if smth i did wrong.

i remember my promise to do one more work with toji, so lately i'll write hdc + drabble with him.

[helloalycia]

worth the wait [two] // daisy johnson

summary: same as the first chapter – it was too long to post in one so this is the remainder of it!

part one | part three | part four | part five | part six | masterlist | wattpad

"What do you think?"

I raised an eyebrow as I poked my head inside the van, glancing around at the cramped space that had stupidly been turned into a living space. There was also, weirdly enough, a computer in the corner which made absolutely no sense.

"I think I have no idea what I'm looking at," I admitted, before looking to an excited Skye beside me. "What is this?"

She bit her lip to contain her grin as she patted the van's door proudly. "This is my new rig."

I almost laughed. "You're kidding."

Her smile lessened. "I'm not."

Now I definitely laughed. "Skye, c'mon, be serious. Whose van is this?"

Her smile disappeared as she clenched her jaw with annoyance. "It's mine. Sorry it isn't fancy enough for you, your majesty."

When I realised she was serious, I lost my smile and looked between the van and her. "Skye, where the hell did you get a van? You can't even drive!"

Clearly holding in her anger, she began to push past me and slide the doors shut. "He said you wouldn't get it," she mumbled to herself, but I heard.

"He?" I questioned with raised eyebrows. "Who the hell is he?"

"Miles," she snapped, stopping moving and looking to me. "Miles is the one who got me the van. He said it was a bad idea to show you and clearly he was right, Y/N. You took one look at it and laughed. He was right."

I smiled tightly, trying not to get worked up at the mention of Skye's new friend. She'd befriended this 'Miles' guy within the past few months and wouldn't stop meeting with him and his friends. He was in the grade above us, but just like her, he'd skip class and do God knows what.

Ever since she'd been hanging around them, she'd been standoffish and distant. She wouldn't contact me as much when she ran away, and she'd been skipping school more often than usual. They were clearly a bad influence on her, but she reassured me she was in control of her own life and knew what she was doing. Being the idiot I am, I fell for her pretty smile and convincing eyes, but this was getting too far now.

"No offence, Skye, but I wouldn't start listening to a guy who can't even make it to class on time," I said to her with a hint of annoyance. "Why do you need a van anyway?"

"Why not?" she countered with her arms crossed. "I thought you'd be happy that I'm finally taking responsibility. Growing up."

My expression softened. "I've never once said that you had to do either of those things."

"You don't need to say it," she mumbled, looking down at her shoes with a frown. "I know you think it. Everyone does."

I stepped forward, resting a hand on her shoulder and finding her eyes with mine. "Where is this coming from? Skye, I have never thought that. All I've ever wanted for you is to be safe and happy. I'm just worried."

She shrugged me off. "Well, now you don't need to be. I've got this."

"You're seventeen, you should be in school studying, not staying in a van," I said tiredly. "You've been missing so much. How are you gonna graduate?"

She avoided my eyes. "That's another thing... I've been thinking and, well, I don't think I want that."

I widened my eyes with disbelief. "What?"

Still avoiding my eyes, she continued, "I don't think I want to graduate."

I was too surprised to find words so quickly. I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

"How can you not want to graduate?!" I asked suddenly, finding my words. "It's what you do! It's what we all do!"

She met my eyes with apologetic ones. "It's what you do, Y/N. I don't want to be at a place that makes me feel like shit. I can't keep pretending I fit in when I don't."

"This isn't you," I told her sternly. "We were supposed to graduate together. You're not stupid, Skye. I can help you study. You can't just give up."

"I'm not," she said with certainty. "I finally know what I'm doing. That's all."

I squeezed my fists together to contain my frustration. "And what's that?"

"The Rising Tide–"

"For fuck's sake!" I cut her off, before hitting the van door with frustration.

"Miles has taught me a lot!" she defended. "They do a lot of good, Y/N! I just want to be apart of something bigger. Something that can help me help others. And something that can help me find my family. My real family."

I clenched my jaw, knowing I was too late in convincing her otherwise. Whatever Miles and the others had told her about their stupid hacking group had worked – she was dropping out of high school and there was nothing I could do to stop her.

"You're gonna be going to university and we both know I can't afford it," she said gently. "We couldn't stay together forever, Y/N. And my foster family definitely don't care what happens to me. I don't fit in anywhere."

I looked to her with glassy eyes. "You fit in with me. You always have."

She pursed her lips as she stayed quiet.

"I'm sorry I didn't make that clear enough," I added bitterly.

"That's not it and you know it," she muttered, shaking her head. "I have to do this. I have to figure myself out. Alone."

I felt stupid for letting her do everything she did leading up to this point. If I had just tried a little harder, maybe things could have been different.

"You're not alone though, are you?" I asked rhetorically. "You've got your new pals at the Rising Tide. It's their damn fault you're doing all this."

"They're not as bad as you think!"

"You've changed because of them!" I argued back. "They created a barrier between you and I. It's because of them that you've... that you've..."

"What?" she snapped, glaring at me. "That I'm finally thinking for myself?!"

I swallowed the lump in my throat and straightened up. "Forget it, just– forget it. I've got a midterm to study for."

She snickered harshly. "Of course. Don't want me slowing you down."

I stayed quiet and turned around to leave. I couldn't see past my anger as I left her with her stupid van. 

Of course, the two of us had been friends for a lot longer than that silly argument, so I was quick to realise how much I actually cared about her and her life, and wanted to apologise for how harsh and unsupportive I sounded.

The next day after school, I decided to head over to her foster family's place to hopefully talk to her. I'd had enough time to think about it and knew I was a lot more levelheaded now that I'd had some space.

I knocked on the front door and waited before an older blonde woman answered. I recognised her as Skye's foster mum, Sally.

"Hi, Mrs Collins," I greeted with a smile. "I'm looking for–”

"Mary doesn't live here anymore," Sally cut me off instantly, surprising me.

I had almost forgotten that Skye's foster family knew her as the name she was given by her orphanage – Mary Sue Poots.

"She doesn't?" I asked with confusion. "But I thought–"

"Goodbye, Miss Y/L/N," Sally interrupted, before slamming the door in my face.

I blinked with confusion before turning around and walking down the steps. It had been a while since I last visited Skye at home. In fact, she made sure I never visited her at home. I guess now I knew why. But then where the hell was she living?

As I walked around the neighbourhood trying to think about where Skye could be, I saw a familiar van parked up on the side of the street and put the pieces together.

Guiltily, I approached the van and sucked up a deep breath before knocking on the side. It didn't take long for the door to slide open and reveal Skye herself.

"Hey," I said quietly, noticing her surprised expression. "Can we talk?"

She licked her lips nervously and nodded, before moving to the side to let me in. I climbed inside and watched as she shut the door before settling on the seat in front of me. I looked around and realised the little details I hadn't noticed yesterday. The little things that made this place Skye's and nobody else's.

"I'd offer you a drink, but I don't have any," she joked to lighten the mood, and I couldn't help but crack a small smile.

I breathed out before meeting her eyes. "Skye, I'm really sorry about yesterday. I shouldn't have reacted like that. If I had known that this was your home, I–"

"You didn't know," she said, shaking her head with embarrassment. "I didn't want you to know. It's my fault."

I pursed my lips, watching as she looked away with pink cheeks. It hurt me to know that she was embarrassed when I didn't care about any of this, I just cared about her.

"I want you to know that I respect your decision to join the Rising Tide," I said gently, making her look up. "If it's what you want, you should go for it."

"It is," she said with certainty.

I chewed on the inside of my mouth before asking, "Is there no way you can finish high school though? Graduate with me?"

She shook her head. "I don't want to, Y/N."

"But that's the bare minimum," I pleaded. "Hacking isn't a lifestyle. You need to work, too, and I can promise you that most places won't look to hire a high school dropout."

She leaned back in her seat and shrugged nervously. "Miles isn't graduating either. And he's got some friends who haven't graduated. They're all doing fine."

I looked down and pinched the bridge of my nose to contain my frustration. I promised myself I wouldn't argue with her, but the mention of her other friends was like a trigger.

"What now?" she asked with annoyance, realising I was annoyed. "You clearly have something to say about them."

"It doesn't matter," I said, biting my tongue.

"Sure it doesn't," she played along.

"It doesn't," I agreed.

"Yeah, and the Hulk isn't bright green," she said sarcastically.

I looked up and glared at her. She stared back challengingly, practically daring me to speak. So, I did.

"Your new hacker friends are the reason you're making these choices," I told her straight. "They're the reason you're making a huge mistake. The reason you're dropping out. And for what? So you can hack like them?"

She rolled her eyes. "I know you look down on us, but we're more than that."

"Skye, I don't give a shit about them!" I shouted without meaning to. "I only care about you!"

"Then stop talking crap about my friends!" she returned angrily.

"Why do you care about them so much?!"

"They gave me a place to stay when I had nowhere! They made me feel like I belonged!"

I frowned, anger replacing with hurt. "I always offered you a place to stay. I only ever wanted you to be safe. You never needed to be different with me. You belonged. Always."

She swallowed hard and looked away from me ashamedly. "Well it doesn't matter anymore. I'm leaving."

I breathed out deeply. "School? Our town? Leaving what?"

"All of it," she said quietly. "I don't expect you to understand."

I looked down to my fumbling hands, a tear slipping from my eye. I had never felt so angry at someone before in my life. She was treating me like I was a stranger, as if I wasn't somebody who knew her inside out. She was treating me like she treated everyone else except her new friends. And I couldn't deal with it anymore.

"Fine," I said, before moving to open the door. I jumped out her van and didn't spare her a glance as I said, "Have fun with the rest of your life. Sorry I didn't care enough."

She didn't say anything and I didn't expect her to. With a broken heart and headache, I left and didn't bother turning back.

—

"What do you mean she's run away?"

"I'm sorry, Y/N," Mr Lock said apologetically. "Her foster family got the note this morning. They're doing what they can to find her. She always turns up, you know that."

I knew her family didn't care if she was gone or not, so I knew Skye definitely wouldn't be found. Unlike usual, Skye hadn't contacted me before leaving, so something told me she wouldn't be turning up.

Our argument was over a week ago and I hadn't seen her since. It had been eating away at me the way we'd left things, but I couldn't find it in myself to face her. I had no idea what to say anyway. And I wasn't sure when she was planning on leaving, so I didn't think it was important right now. Clearly, I was wrong.

"I just thought you should know," Mr Lock said with a nod. "The police will come by soon to get a statement from you."

As usual. Except this time, I actually had no idea where she was.

I nodded, my mouth going dry. "Thank you... can I go now?"

He nodded hesitantly. "Of course."

I left his office and headed straight outside behind the bleachers where nobody could hear or see me. The first thing I did was try to ring Skye, but there was no answer and no way to leave a voicemail. I tried several times, hoping she'd pick up, but she didn't. And that's when I remembered the burner phone.

Immediately pulling it out, I turned it on and saw the message from her appear on my screen. I was quick to open it, my heart racing like it did every time she ran away. I knew she wasn't coming back this time though.

Hey, Y/N. I know you probably hate me, but I felt like I owed you this. I said I was leaving and I have. I can't tell you where. And I'm not good at goodbyes. I've had too many of them and I couldn't bring myself to say it to you. I'm sorry I pushed you away. I never wanted to, but I guess some things are inevitable, huh? I've managed to do it all my life, this isn't any different. I'm just sorry if I hurt you in the process. Anyway, this is pretty long and I don't even know if you read it, but yeah. I'm sorry. I wish things could have been different.

The text ended there and I found myself rereading it to myself over and over, her words imprinted in my mind. I knew we'd argued and exchanged hurtful words, but I never in a million years thought she'd leave without saying goodbye. I thought I meant more to her than this. But no. I was just another foster family she ran away from. And I wasn't so sure I'd see her again.

[afuckingbeetroot]

Could you do Marcus Pike and his fiancée watching a romantic comedy movie with 39. It’s an epic love story, a love across the cosmos., instead please?

This turned out so much better than I was expecting it to and I'm pretty happy with it to be my first request. Hope you like it! Shout out to @krissology for inspiring the "movie" plot teehee.

Rating: PG-13

Word Count: 564

Warnings: Fluff, cuddling, kissing/make out, reader's bad mood, Marcus being his cute self

Prompt 39: It's an epic love story, a love across the cosmos

It had been a very long day for you only to come home and find Marcus being as cheerful as ever. "Hey honey, glad your home, I picked up some dinner for us. Hope you're hungry." You breathe out harshly through your nose. You couldn't be mad at him for having a better day than you but after the day you had, boy, did you want to be. "How do you do it?" You ask after a moment of silence. "Do what?" He furrows his brow, zeroing in on your exasperated face. Its starting to come to him that something happened today.

"Be so happy, I guess." You say forlornly, looking down and picking at your fingernails. "I should be asking how do you be so grumpy. Whats wrong? Talk to me." You sigh through your nose again. "Everything. All the time. Its gotten to a point that I'm seriously considering finding a new job." He hums seemingly to himself as he considers your demeanor. "That bad, huh?" He shifts his jaw on the last word. You nod solemnly.

"Go sit down and pick a movie, I'll heat up the takeout. When I get done we can eat and enjoy the movie and you can tell me all about it or not. Whatever you want." He reaches over and touches your upper arm, kissing your temple before he turns around to the microwave.

You shouldn't be surprised by how thoughtful he is as you move to the couch to settle on a romance movie. "Marcus?" "Yea, hun?" He calls out over his shoulder. "You're always so thoughtful and taking such good care of me. Thank you." He just huffs over a smile before joining you with dinner. Once he gets settled in a comfortable position with you in which you can both somewhat cuddle and eat, he finally responds.

"You never need to thank me for being here for you, baby. I do it because I love you." His soft tone and the look of adoration in his eyes is enough to make you tear up, and for a moment, you do. "I love you too." He kisses you briefly but nonetheless passionately before turning his attention back to the movie.

The romance you chose without much thought turns out to be pretty good. The further it gets you realize the story is very well thought out and detailed. Its about a couple who have seen each other in dreams since they were young and don't realize what it all means until they cross paths in real life. The man later tells his new found lover that he believes their souls were made of the same star, destined to find each other again.

"That's us, baby." Marcus gently interjects from behind your shoulder. "What?" You assume he's talking about the movie but still wish for him to elaborate. "The movie couple. Its an epic love story, a love across the cosmos. Thats definitely us. Soulmates." You literally 'aww' out loud at his remark. "You really think so?" "I know so. Now come on, the movies over and you deserve a warm bath. I want to make sure you feel absolutely fine before bed so you can make a decision about your job sometime soon." You just turn over and stare into his eyes, sighing happily, content that this is the man you're gonna marry.

[scarasimplysimping]

These Books Of You Part 2

Xingqiu x Reader

Part 1

V

Sypnosis: A boy of noble blood and disciple to the Guhua Clan, Xingqiu has been reading books of the heroic adventures of an elusive adepti, [Y/N] ever since he was a little boy.

Now a bit older, he sets everything aside in a journey to meet you.

Xingqiu was scolded harshly when he returned but he could hardly focus. Xingqiu could think of nothing but you and how he kissed-

He burries his face in his hand in embarrassment.

"Stop that. What's wrong with you?" Chongyun asks, sitting cross-legged on Xingqiu's bed.

"Oh Dear Chongyun, I kissed their hand." He replies in a muffled voice.

"Disgusting."

"You are not helping!"

Chongyun snickers, "What are they like?"

"Perfect." He responds, almost instantly.

"You'll have to be more specific than that."

"They saved me."

"You have a broken arm." Chongyun points out.

"I fell down while climbing though it should heal in 8 weeks at most."

"Foolish."

"Worth it."

Chongyun slouches on the bed as Xingqiu continues to ramble about you.

The following day feels as if it was the longest for Xingqiu. He could not bear the anticipation for nightfall and made sure to check the clock in his bedroom every ten seconds.

Now, you've been at the statue of Pervases since afternoon, paying your respects.

Xingqiu knew where the statue was. The traveler, Aether informed him of this but also told him to be careful as there were lots of hostiles in the path.

Xingqiu encountered none. There was this tugging feeling at the back of his head saying you cleared them all just for him. Which you did.

He arrived at the area and saw you, sitting near the statue with your eyes closed. The young man stared at you, contemplating about how peaceful you looked.

"Are you going to keep staring or will you sit down?" You ask, not looking at him.

"Apologies. My liege- I mean (Y/N). I was merely captivated by your beauty once again."

You open your eyes, taking in his expression.

He was dead serious.

You feel your cheeks heat up and in an effort to maintain your composure, you abruptly stand up and turn your back to him. You've come to terms with the fact that Xingqiu is a man of impulse. This, you could admire.

He is confused but decides not to bring it up.

Silence.

When the awkwardness becomes uncomfortable, he speaks again, "Would you like me to read these books of you out loud? I mean they're very interesting but it's fine if you don't considering that you already know what has happened-"

"Do as you wish."

The swordsman finds a comfortable place to sit and pulls out a heavy book.

Well this was gonna be a long night.

Once he starts reading, you find yourself unable to tear away your focus from his soft voice. You've lived these memories in your own life, and some you didn't even want to relive but still, you're drawn in by his sweet, sweet voice.

The night is mostly like this. There is occasional small talk like 'that is not how it happened.' Or 'May you please explain this part to me in detail? I want to know how you felt during this battle.'

You find if difficult to hold your tongue when he asks. Even the painful memories become just nostalgic when you explain to him. Xingqiu also tries not to overstep the boundaries despite wanting to know every single detail.

Weeks pass enough so that his arm eventually heals. And even more. Though he only gets to see you one night out of seven moons, he feels as if you two grow a bond, an unbreakable one. And you felt it too.

"-So I paid for all the damage dear Chongyun caused!"

You chuckle at the story, pitying his friend.

Silence.

You look at Xingqiu, confused as to why he stopped telling his story.

"You... you laughed," He points out, amazed. "I made you laugh..."

His cheeks were tainted with a blush. You could almost swear you saw his soul ascend to heaven.

"Hmmm... perhaps it's because I find it easy, tolerating your company. Maybe at times, I enjoy it," You say to stroke his ego a little .

"How did you get your vision?" He asks, eying the vision you had.

"Well... I used to be a mortal," You start, staring off into the distance.

The boy's eyes widen with curiosity and amazement, "I never knew of this! It's not mentioned in any of the books..."

"I never told anyone... Except now."

Xingqiu felt honored to be the first one you'd share your story with in thousands of years.

Suddenly, you question yourself.

Why were you so comfortable with him? Did he do some sort of sorcery on you? Why were you so important to him? Why was he so important to you? These thoughts raced in your head you could not think straight. Eons of slaughter did this to you. It broke you. Maybe it's just paranoia or all the lives you took finally taking a toll on you, giving you your own demons that prevented you from having nice things.

"How long will you stay with me?"

"Forever."

Liar

"No... Nevermind," You say, once again building your walls around yourself. The walls he tried so desperately to tear down.

Xingqiu frowns, "Why?"

You stay silent.

"(Y/N), you should not bear all your burden alone forever," He says, reaching out for your hand as if asking for your trust.

You don't accept it.

"It's not your place," You say in a stoic tone.

"But I'm your friend aren't I?"

His question is once again returned with silence.

"(Y/N), please I know how you feel-"

You feel yourself snap and say things you didn't even mean, "You know nothing of how I feel and you aren't my friend. You're merely an annoying mortal who wants to befriend me because you... you pity me. I disappointed you! I was not as heroic as those books say but you're too afraid to tell me-"

"(Y/N), none of that is true!" He grabs your shoulders, forcing you into eye contact, only then Xingqiu notices the tears, streaming down your cheeks.

He wonders what happened for you to be this reserved. Everyone always has a turning point. How long must you have yearned for someone to share the pain with you? How many times did they fail you? He was here now. You could trust him. He was prepared to wait. If you could just give him a chance, show him a sign, he would do anything for you because he

"I love you," Xingqiu whispers, wiping your tears away.

It was beautiful. The night, how the stars perfectly reflected in his eyes. The way he cups your cheeks with his slender hands. The way you felt as if you could just melt in his touch. The quiet. The moon. The relationship-

But every relationship had it's problems.

And in this one, it was you.

"You mean nothing to me. Just a face I'll forget after five hundred years," You say coldly, looking him straight in the eyes before vanishing from his sight.

"Forever."

Liar. Liar. Liar

Reality hits Xingqiu like a bucket of cold water. Of course. Of course he was just a human waving his fancy little sword around. He tried so desperately to gain your approval, pathetic as a clown. The Archons were probably laughing their heads off at how foolish he had been.

Xingqiu scoffs at himself, first he starts laughing, though that quickly turns into full blown sobs.

He's glad you left so you would not have to witness him in this shameful state.

But you didn't leave. You were still there. Just invisible to him. You wanted to make sure he got home safely. Quite ironic considering the only one that had posed real danger to him, was you.

Weeks pass with no sign of Xingqiu. You grew more and more restless and empty by the day. The adeptus noticed. Morax noticed.

"(Y/N), do you wish to become a mortal again?" He asked you one afternoon.

"You... you can do that?"

"You can," He replies. "Your vision was given to you along with your immortality when we made the contract."

Then suddenly, you understood what had to be done.

The other adeptus were surprisingly supportive of your decision. Even Xiao mentioned how he envied you for having a choice.

It felt weird to walk in the streets of Liyue Harbor. You have not visited this place since the time it was nothing but a wasteland of vengeful gods yet now the city was lively. Their were children running around and playing, street vendors attracting customers, lovers walking hand in hand. All this was fruit of your victories of war, was it not? Would it be such a sin to enjoy it?

Your thoughts are cut short when you feel someone grab you and harshly pull you into an alleyway.

"Xingqiu?" Was your first thought.

"We couldn't be more different."

You turn to the voice and find a light haired male, matching the description as someone in Xingqiu's stories.

"Chongyun."

He nods, seemingly unamused, then he glares, "What did you say to Xingqiu?"

"Hurtful things I shouldn't have," You admit, wincing at the memory.

Chongyun sees the glint of guilt in your eyes, "Well you better fix it."

"Where can I find him?"

You shock him with your eagerness. Perhaps... you weren't so bad Chongyun thought.

He brings you to Xingqiu's residence.

"Climb the window," He says. "I'll wait here. He won't talk to me."

Xingqiu mentioned a strict household once but you never expected that the only way out was sneaking through a window, though.

You, despite eons of combat training, quite clumsily stumble into the room.

There was no sign of Xingqiu... other than the uneven lump, the shape of Xingqiu under the blankets.

"Go away, Chongyun." He says, in a rather raspy voice.

You feel extremely guilty again. You caused this. This was your fault. Maybe he was better of without you-

No. No. These were the kind of thoughts that put you both in this situation in the first place. You were no longer going to listen to them.

"It's me, Xingqiu," Finally announcing yourself.

You here a small gasp but after that, nothing more.

Not knowing where to start or what to say, you settle on continuing the conversation that got cut off by your paranoid thoughts last time.

"I was once a mortal."

"Why are you still here? Don't you have someone else's heart to break?"

Well... at least now he was talking.

You decide to continue talking.

"I had a lover."

A yaksha. A strong and kind yaksha. A most gentle and lively man who never failed to save lives and vanquish foes. He always told you of his dreams to serve the geo archon and bring peace to the land.

"How long will you stay with me?" You ask, playing with his hair.

"Forever."

But he lied.

He fell victim to corruption after all the blood had been spilled and all the sins had been sinned.

He went on a rampage, destroying everything he came across and killing anyone who stood in his way. Innocent or sinner.

Except for you.

So you were the one to put an end to it all as you quite literally pierced an arrow through his heart.

And you regretted it. Inconsolable, you were.

Morax took pity on you and offered you what had been your lover's dream to serve, his powers, and eternal life.

"This vision isn't mine, Xingqiu. It's his," You finish the story, grasping the electro vision tightly.

"Xingqiu, I owe you an apology. I'm not exactly stable. I thought I didn't deserve nice things. I thought... I thought that by loving you, I would doom one of us to infinite suffering while the other, death," You admit, tearfully. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I-"

His arms wrap around your waist. It's almost scary how you didn't notice him get up and make his way toward you how low your guard was.

"I love you, Xingqiu."

"I love you too, (Y/N)."

"Miss (Y/N)," Chongyun calls out, when he passes by you in the street one day.

"I don't know if this means anything to you... but your vision seems to be at peace. I cannot explain this either. It has an aura as if it were alive."

You hold the hilt of your sword, aiming it at the vision that was currently on the ground.

Xingqiu places a kiss on your cheek before stepping back. "Whenever you're ready."

Months past after your reconciliation with him. The both of you have been happy together ever since.

The only way for you to become mortal again was to destroy the thing that bound you to immortality. The vision.

When you first told Xingqiu, he was hesitant. To think you'd give up your powes and eternal life just to grow old with him. But this was your choice. You spent years taking lives and saving them. Now you just wanted to take back your own. To live your own.

You inhale sharply and with all your force, bring the sword down.

It shatters the vision into a thousand glistening pieces. Sorrowful yet calm and beautiful. You had long forgiven the yaksha. And it seems he, you.

Xingqiu snakes a hand around your waist and  pulls you so that you're facing him. You inch your face closer to his and kiss him, it was a long kiss that left you out of breath. The kind of kiss that told you everything would be alright. The kind you read about in books.

"How long will you stay with me?" He asks.

"Forever."

And there were no lies this time.

[hnychn]

𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄 𝐀 𝐅𝐔𝐒𝐄

pairing: mina x fem! reader

summary: no one every thought you were capable of exploding, but they also didn't know they were only lighting your fuse. and it was slowly getting shorter.

note🐝: warning: homophobia!! i love this girl too much not to write a headcanon about her. also! i know i said i would be working on a hawks fic, but it's a lot harder than i thought it would be lol. so instead, i'll be working on smaller headcanon fics while i work on it! i have a little angsty one coming up next with class a's big three :) as always, lmk what you thought! 🤍 -honey

𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

so to begin with, your relationship with mina is very much ✨yes✨

like bro, she's so hype and energetic and ready to do just about anything

and you're so calm and down to earth and ready to do just about anything

you just go along with her ideas, no matter how crazy they can be

because you're 🥰whipped🥰

but i mean who wouldn't?

anyways, so as much as I'd like to believe this world is 100% a utopia, it isn't

so when you and mina came out with your relationship,

obviously all of your friends supported you guys,

but there were some people who would give the two of you disgusted looks in the halls

and they would talk shit behind your back,

but never to your face, assholes 😤

but y'all two are some ✨bad bitches✨

so you don't fucking care 🤪🤪

like talk yo shit bitch

but we all know you're just scared 🥰🥰

but recently you notice mina has been a bit reserved with her love for you in public

like, normally she's all over you and kissing your cheeks and shit 24/7 🥰🥰

ugh i love her

and she's a confident girl and you know she doesn't pay much attention to all the nasty words people throw your way

so you don't really worth much

but she has been reserved like i said

and you start to worry 😔✋🏼

in your dorms during cuddle time, you ask her

"is everything okay, amor?"

please i'm spanish let me have this 😩

and she just nods, "of course, babe."

so you leave it at that

because the two of you are so communicative in your relationship

you think she'll tell you when she's ready

but she doesn't

so you get even more worried.

and you go ask jirou about it

and she looks at you a bit weird because

"bitch you don't know?"

you shake your head.

jirou sighs, "some people have been cornering her after school and calling her some. . .not so pretty names for being lesbian.."

and you just-

I SEE REDDD,

REDD

you have never been one for confrontation,

and actively avoided it

but being friends with bakusquad only riased your chances of being in arguments or fights

you were the passive one of the group

the one hat kept bakugo in line

but everyone had their limits

and yours was just pushed 🥰🥰

completely disregarding the fact that first class was about to start,

you for their names and class number from jirou

and off you were 😌

the rest of bakusquad, who weren't too far off and heard jirou spill the beans to you, were hot on your trail

kiri was trying to rationalise with you, they all were,

🦈 "c'mon, y/n, classis gonna start soon, this isn't worth it."

💥 "be smart about this, dumbass! you'll get suspended!"

⚡️ "maybe you should calm down a bit y/n!"

mina and sero weren't there

the two went off to get some drinks before class started

and were chilling in class thinking y'all just went off to the bathroom or whatever

now, when you get to their class you just-

bURST IN

your hands curled into fists by your side and a calm look on your face

but your eyes were bringing with pure rage

their teacher wasn't there yet either

and you-

"where the fuck is nishida and akame?"

your voice was chilly calm and it sent shivers down everyone's spine

kirishima had a grip on the back of your shirt to make sure you shouldn't do anything stupid

bakugo and kaminari were just standing at the door

a boy and a girl then stood up, a condescending look on their faces

"what's it to you, bitch?"

i'm sorry i just can't write a homophobic slur it physically hurts me 😭✋🏼

"is this about us cornering that pink bitch?"

"you concerned about your lover, freak?"

"the pair of you are nothing but disgusting."

you didn't really take any of their comments to heart

but obviously mina did if she started to be more reserved

and your heart begins to race from all the r a g e burning in your body

because you start to imahinehow mina must have felt

have to face such harsh words alone

and bottling it all up

and how harsh they must have been to have her, a girl so confident and optimistic, become reserved

and in the blink of an eye, you

fUCKING LUNGE AT THEM

and begin to bEAT THE SHIT OUTTA THEM

kiri, baku, and kami are low-key cheering you on

but also ready to jump in if you start losing

which you don't 🥰

because you're a bad bitch 🥰

and you know how to fight 🥰

but you also don't realise that some people begin to record

oops-

i won't go into detail about the fight, you can imagine it however you want

plus i'm terrible at writing fight scenes 😭✋🏼

but eventually the teacher shows up

and goes to get aizawa because she recognises the four of you as 1-a students

so he comes, ahaha 😅

and he sees you going at these two students

(highkey proud you're winning).

now, aizawa isn't stupid

he's heard the whispers

and he hates that two of his students are being bashed for just loving

dadzawa

but he's a teacher first and foremost,

so he binds you up and pulls you away from the students

some students groan from the entertainment being over

aizawa glares at them

he gives you a little glare when you struggle a bit in his binds

"kirishima, bakugo, kaminari," aizawa's voice booms through the silence that settled over the class, "detention for not stopping this when i know you three could have very well prevented it."

but i know why you didn't - words unspoken on aizawa's tongue.

"you're coming with me, l/n"

so he unbinds you and the two of you walk to his office

it's silent when you get there and he gestures for you to take a seat

"do you know why what you did was wrong?"

you nod.

"you you regret it?"

your answer came almost instantly, "no. and i would do it again in a heartbeat."

aizawa nodded, "good."

and you-

HUH???? 😀

"i understand why you did it and i don't blame you for wanting to confront the people who hurt mina, but you also understand why i have to suspend you, right?"

you nod.

he nods.

it's a mutual understanding he wouldn't suspend you if he had the choice,

but he has to

so you're suspended .

and the videos the other students took blow up

and it gets back to mina

so she watches it obviously

and 😳😳😳

she was bLUSHINGGG

like bro-

tHATS YOU??

her calm bundle of joy??

absolutely hammering those two students??

she has a hard time believing it

but lo and behold, there's the charm bracelet the two of you add to every anniversary on your wrist

the one you're punching the boy with 💀💀

and -

she has never in her life been more turned on like-

hOLY FUCK THATS HOT 😫😫

"CAN YOU BEAT ME LIKE THAT PLEASE??"

like queen, what? 😀

she bursts into your dorm after school

and throws herself onto you

and

"baby the was both the scariest and hottest thing i've ever seen.."

while peppering kisses to your neck

and her hand slithers its way up your shirt

c h i l l s

"yeah?" you smirk

she hums and sucks hickies onto your neck-

😌😌😌 yeah. . .

shit gets a little steamy after that 😌😌

after,

the two of you are just chilling in the after glow,

the sweat sticking you two together a bit, but neither of you minded

mina traces over the hickies she left on your chest and neck, "you should get angry more often."

"if it'll lead to more of this, then you know damn straight i will."

after that no one cares to even look in either of your directions 😌

[little-ikea-waldo]

Former Employee // Closed

Matt felt lucky to have Ryan moving in with him if only to have someone by his side to bitch about the travel and the paperwork and the people with who would understand. He might not get as annoyed as him but he'd at least get where Matt was coming from. Especially since they were coming from the same place over hours of driving each day. Theres a few times they should have been on the road but found something g fun to do. Maki g up the time by falling asleep at the wheel. They could have taken naps in the car at a stop, or even chugged some energy drinks, but they usually just settled in somewhere with a late checkout and struggled to get out of bed the next day.

All in all it was a trip he wouldn't forget, so he tried not to feel bad about being probably the main reason for having to take it.

When they actually part to go to their own assigned rooms Matt takes his time looking at all the details of the building and decore as he went. Not because he was interested but maybe because he was stalling. There was something very final feeling about going into his new room. He agreed to this but he didn't exactly want to do it. He reaches into his pocket with the hand that's not towing his suitcase and his fingers touch the body temp metal that was the reason they drove here instead of flying.

Get to the room at least.

He thinks as he starts to hurry down the hall a bit more. He unlocks the room and steps into this new ring just like he did the last; knowing he was fucked. It didn't matter, this was about Ryan anyways. It was also nice to have a few other familiar and friendly faces around, even in this same house. He's heard if they were a little earlier there would have been a few more, but maybe it was all for the best.

Anyways.

After he takes a minute to unwind and free the pendant from his pocket after all the took them to check in with the administration and housing, he finally starts to explore the room and unpack as he did. Most of his stuff had been sent ahead so it was all about opening the boxing and finding where it would all go. He has a few shirts in his hand when he gets to the closet, and there taped on the inside of the door was a piece of paper, folded in half but flapping around. He takes it when he's done hanging his shirts up and sits in his school-provided gamer desk chair to give this a look over. On the inside it read:

Hopefully, you find this on your first day, if anyone ever finds this before this program is disbanded or gets burned down by some crazy Theta. Hopefully, as the former tenant of this dorm, I can give you some advice to get started here before it all goes to shit for you.

Like, don't get involved with the drama, even of your friends. You have to actually try to work to get better here, it's not going to happen by accident. And be open to new experiences and new people. Who knows, walking up to the right door might just change your life. It did for me. This one might seem a little out of place but you probably shouldn't kiss your best friend either. It just seems to do a lot more harm than good.

So, enjoy the room and the campus! I'm gone, so you're next, as they say. Best wishes,

-Mark

Matt could help himself from laughing as he read the name signed on the bottom, snorting and cackling there all by himself as the paper is wrinkled in the clutches of his hands. He gets up and heads out his door to the hallway. A good laugh like this couldn't be kept to yourself. "Ryan!" He calls heading in the direction he last saw his friend walking. "Ryan guess whose room I got!" He was gonna get a kick out of this.

[heresathreebee]

That G-D Ring of Yours

High Fidelity’s Robyn Brooks X Female reader

Summary: You seek comfort from your neighbor Rob

Masterlist

There's probably gonna be a part 2

Word count: 2.5k words

Warning(s): +15 | implied cheating, internalized homophobia, heterosexism, author and Rob swearing, no hate to polyamorists but major hate to bad faith players, shameless self insert, no beta, barely edited, long as fuck I'm so sorry

Author's note: I'm having anxiety for no discernable reason and my brain has decided this is ideal fuel for a fic, so please enjoy. EDIT: ha ha yeah still anxious but we're doing stuff about it

-------------------------------------------------------

"-- And she just touched my hand by accident and I just felt this–  this spark between us…" 

It was so sweet how he was talking about it. Or at least it would be were this not your fiancé explaining how he had been seeing another person behind your back. Had you rushed into things with him? Gotten hitched after three months because of familial pressure to settle down and start your family? Quite possibly.

But it didn't make that stabbing in your gut hurt any less. 

You had been a little gung-ho from date number 1, but he had been right there with you the whole time. Date number 2 happened the following weekend and then you just kept seeing each other more and more until before you knew it you had been introduced to each other's extended families and announced your engagement on Valentine's Day. 

You started to suspect something was amiss on Sunday, when you were braiding your hair on the bed and he had gone to take a shower. He accidentally set his phone screen aside with a text chat still open. Thinking nothing of it (he had already told you he was talking to Mark about getting drinks tonight), you looked at the name and saw it belonged to a woman you had never heard of before. Your immediate reaction was 'she must be a new coworker or a cousin,' but then you glanced again and saw the text conversation mirrored the same kind of ‘sentiments’ he texts you. 

The dirt burned into your brain for eternity: 

You had looked away then. You were actually not going to say anything at all to him that night– had planned to bring it up after Tuesday dinner with your auntie's family, but something came up. It turns out that Jessabelle also frequented the same Starbucks as you (and she's your age, not a teen like you worried). You can't even find it in you to be mad at her since it seemed like she had no idea who you were when she showed you the picture of her date at a baseball game. You tried not to puke as you asked for her number and to send her that picture "for her contact profile." 

You hadn't heard a word your fiance had said since the beginning of the phone call and you cut him off with some excuse you barely remember. You tossed your phone carelessly onto the couch and laid back on the cushions in defeat. What now? 

You weren't really a drinker or a smoker, and you didn't exactly have friends who would be supportive right now. You could hear them now, your family too– asking you what you did wrong, telling you to just forgive him or how to get even, or simply saying 'well what do you expect? Boys will be boys.' 

Maybe… no, you definitely need to get this off your chest before you do something stupid like pretend to forget about it. You had a bad habit of that because you tend to fall fast and hard. Perhaps your neighbor could give you some advice. 

Thank the Lord for fire escapes. Rob lived on the floor beneath you, always playing something good from her huge collection of vinyl records. You've told her at least a hundred times before if she played nothing but Phil Collins for the rest of eternity, you could die happy. You crossed your fingers and hoped you weren't being weird or invading her privacy. 

Thankfully, she seemed to be expecting you. She even motioned that the latch was undone and waved you inside. Ok the second wine glass made your face grow hot. 

"I'm not interrupting am I?" 

Rob gave you a warm smile. "I could hear you pacing around your kitchen for about an hour. Was about to come and get you actually." 

She pressed the glass into your hand and you made an effort not to grimace. Rob liked her drinks cheap and strong and she never held back. You tried a sip just to be polite, and she snorted at the face you pulled. 

"That's right, you like that sweet stuff. What's it called again?" 

"Stella Rosa," you mumbled, grateful when she takes the glass back and hands you a water to replace it. 

"Favorite flavor," she asked looking at her phone. 

"Uh… the peach and the rosé. They're all pretty good, not gonna lie." 

"OK, take this, grab a blanket from the hall closet, and tell me what's going on." 

You curled up on Rob's couch and put your feet up. There were piles of records all over the place, empty beer cans and a pizza box or two on the coffee table. Your neighbor tapped away at her phone screen before silencing it and slipping it in her back pocket. She gave you a minute or two to speak up, sipping her drink like you two had all night. Which actually you did as you did not want to see your fiancé right now. 

You felt two fingers gently tap your forehead. "Come on, dreamer, tell me what's going on in that head of yours." 

You swallow the lump in your throat. "I feel a little over dramatic saying my life is about to fall apart." 

Rob raised her eyebrows at you. "Damn, OK." 

You rush to correct yourself– explain your weird sentiment in more detail but you end up just vomiting words until your voice is hoarse. 

"I mean– like– like it's not falling apart per say or whatever– I… the rest of my life is fine its just my relationship that's screwed. Which I guess I'm more worried about because it's gonna screw up all my other relationships for a while too– dang it, let me start over–" 

"Babe! Slow down. Breathe." Rob switched drinks with you and against your better judgement you took a sip. Oddly enough it did calm you down. "So… it's your fiancé, right? What did he do?" 

You stared at her trying to unscramble your thoughts. "He… I found out he was kind of... dating another person. After I found out, he tried to explain that he didn't think I would mind–" 

Rob barked, "let me guess: he didn't think you were exclusive? Pull the Main Chick, Side Chick schtick? Tried to claim 'polyamory' after he got caught?" 

Two and two clicked together at last. "Yeah… yeah, he did!," you scoffed, "and it's not like it didn't ever come up in conversation: we spent our third date talking out our, like, sexualities and fantasies and fetishes and shit. If he was polyamorous, wh- why wouldn't he have brought it up then?" 

"That is so fucked." 

You took a deeper draft of her wine, coughing before setting it aside. Up until now, you've been numb. Now there's this wave of anger boiling up to the surface and you hear yourself getting louder. Rob doesn't flinch but she does give you this look of empathy unlike anything you've seen before. 

"If he– if he would have just asked me, I would have told him it was fine. My family does shit like that all the time: nobody bats an eye! If he really thought I wouldn't mind, he wouldn't have been so freaking sneaky about it. He literally lied, Robyn!" 

You whipped around and for a brief moment you knew you looked crazy. "He said he was going out for drinks with his guy friend, but he was making plans to go to a baseball game with a girl I've never heard of! If he really thought I wouldn't mind, or if he 'thought I would understand,' then why would go out of his way to lie about who he was with?" 

Someone buzzed Rob's door and she left you on the couch momentarily, coming back quickly with two bottles of your favorite wine. "Damn girl, these are kinda bougie: Peach or Rosé?" 

"I--"you choked, "Robyn you didn't have to–" 

"Peach it is!" She unscrewed the caps and handed you the whole freaking bottle of white, downing the last of her merlot and getting a fresh glass for you. 

You felt a little guilty she had spent money on you. But then again it had been her choice. If she didn't want you there, Rob wouldn't have let you in in the first place. Maybe you were just a tinsy bit worried you shouldn't be here. 

You and Rob took a break from talking to put on music and get a little tipsy. It came much easier with the help of the Stella Rosa, though Rob initially complained it was 5.5%, she did get accustomed to the sweetness pretty fast, and after consuming half the bottle, realized it was a little easier to get carried away with a drink like this. She admitted it was her first time trying rosé and now she was hooked. Eventually you started talking again, just spilling your guts out with no filter anymore. 

"I really think I just hate myself," you said cuddling the cool glassware. "When I found out, I wasn't even thinking of it as a betrayal of my trust– it felt like I was trying to come to terms with it so I could continue with the relationship. Not because it would make me happy but because… I don't know… it's what everybody else wants me to do. They don't even know about it and I was fully prepared not to tell them even though they'd want me to marry him whether they knew or not." 

Rob barked a laugh of surprise. "Doh-K!" 

"What?" 

"Nothing, nothing…" she said, "keep going." 

You stared off into the middle distance and leaned into her side. She was a tiny bit warm despite her lithe figure. Made you want to throw your blanket over her shoulders and share your greater warmth. 

So you did (you're not great at acting out your desires but this is nice!)

"It's just easier," the words left your mouth unbidden, "I don't even know what that means, but it's true. I don't want to marry him anymore but I don't want to break it off. Not marrying Fiancé means disappointing my family. It means having to find an entire new man to marry sooner rather than later because I'm already 'behind' and lowering my already low expectations. 

"It's not gonna make me happy, but I just think it's easier to keep this wedding going because at least I won't have to find somebody new who might not be as good for me just because I didn't want him. Another man won't make me happy so there's no reason to drop him... except that I don't want him." 

Rob's brow furrowed. "Are you saying it's easier for you to please your family than it is to be happy?" 

"Yes? I– no, I– … I don't know," you sigh. "I guess you could say my priorities are a little… mismanaged." 

"Sure, you could say that." Rob wrapped her arms around your shoulders and you inhaled the scent of her soap and cigarettes. "What if you tried… like… not doing that anymore...? You just said you do whatever your family wants you to do. So, just like do what makes you happy for a change." 

It really does sound so simple the way she puts it, doesn't it? Why are you doing this to yourself? You're not dependent on them for money or security or happiness for that matter. So... why has your whole life been centered around pleasing them? 

"I think… I think I've never really sat down and thought about what makes me happy," you admitted. "I think it's just been that way forever and I might have been too scared to try anything else." 

Rob hummed. "Are you still scared now?" 

Are you? You look into her eyes and ask yourself a question that has never crossed your mind with such depth. You used to be scared– but what is it about your happiness that you are so afraid of? OK, let’s start a little simpler: what are things that make you happy? 

“I like…” you swallowed, trying to break down the barriers you’ve built years and years ago. “I like… coffee. I like… short skirts. I like… girls– I like… my job. I like… music. I think I’d enjoy camping, you know, some day…” 

Your words… these things seemed so arbitrary and trivial. But in your house, these things cause dissent. “My family has an opinion about everything. There’s no right way to live in all of their eyes, but I think I figured out a way to get past it. Keep my head down and do what’s expected of me. Graduate college, get a respectable job, find a man to marry, drop the job and become a mother. Just… don’t make waves. It seemed better because the cousins who didn’t or couldn’t… well they became the butt of every joke at the family dinner. Lisa had one miscarriage so she was a ‘failure’ and Don never dated girls so he was gay and that was ‘bad,’ but grandma Zelda did everything a good Christian woman could do and they still gossiped about her behind her back… 

“And I just… I just let their ignorance control me for my entire life.” God, you could cry right now, but somehow it just felt too good to say it outloud. “That.. that is so fucked.” 

Robyn snorted, and you turned to her as if you’d forgotten she was there. There it was again, that sympathy. Not pity, she did not burden you with tears of her own or try to be angry for you. She just listened and understood. You twisted the diamond encrusted ring on your finger and stared at her. You felt it, that feeling in your heart. No one else had given you that look, like she could really see you. 

“You’re not going back to Fiancé, are you?” Her question was equal parts worrisome and hopeful and you already knew the answer in your heart. 

“No.”

And that was it. Decision made. Actually easier than you'd thought. Maybe not down the road but it felt good for now. There's the telling your fiancé it's over, the moving out, the public announcement, the inevitable feeling of failure, your family, god, his family too. Untangling your lives would be long and hard. You're not sure if you have that level of commitment and motivation in you but fuck it. Problems for tomorrow.

You rest your head on Rob's shoulder and hope your not pushing any boundaries. She doesn't stop you though, in fact she snuggles you deeper into her. You get the feeling she's been here before though your not sure which side or how bad it was for her.

"I like you way more in the few times I've met you than any man I've ever dated," you heard yourself say. "I'm sure that means something but I'm too tired to decide anymore. No tonight at least."

Rob chuckled. "I like you too, sugar."

If you made it this far, hi 💛 appreciate you, leave me a comment! Or just comment "💛"

[artificialqueens]

Gimme Love, 6/9 (Miz Cracker/Blair St Clair) - Grinder

AN: Welp, I'm back from travelling! For anyone interested to know how it went; it was great (if you love stress). Liverpool is a lovely place but I've destroyed my bank account :D

Anyway! We got 4 more chapters of this fic! This is where the conflict begins. I hope yall enjoy.

TW for this chapter: Homophobia, homophobic slurs

2020

The cake was in the fridge. We'd be seeing him later. For now, we settled for some spaghetti. It had become a sort of tradition for Jujubee and me for moments that needed celebrating. But we hadn't done it in so long, what with the stress of work.

"So, Juju, as you can see, I've labelled the pages you're allowed to read, so don't go looking at other shit, OK?" I asked, chopping up a red bell pepper.

"Why? If I do, am I gonna find some porn-y shit?" She quipped, running a hand along with the butterfly print book.

"Honestly, you know all of those details anyway." I gave her a smirk, taking a piece of pepper and throwing it over to her.

I almost expected it to fly past her head, but she caught it in her mouth. Skill.

"OK, but what's in the box, though?"

I almost forgot what she was even referring to. But following her gaze, I saw it, sitting on the kitchen counter beside the fridge. "Oh, that?" I scraped the peppers into the saucepan, "That is my memory box."

"Ooh, that's even more exciting." She beamed.

"No. We're not opening it." I moved on to an onion.

"Aw, why not?" Jujubee whined.

"Because I made my Mom promise me she wouldn't give it to me until I turned 50. But I was weak and begged her to give it back. So now, I've promised myself to not look inside until I turn 50." The air was no longer clean, poisoned with the acid from the onion. My eyes were beginning to sting.

"Aw, Brie, you don't need to get all emotional about it." She had to go and joke about the tear now trickling down my cheek.

"Girl, this is torture," I wipe my eye along my wrist, pretty sure my eyeshadow has been fucked up. "Did I fuck up the smokey eye?"

"Nope." I knew she was lying to me, but she couldn't take her eyes away, "You look absolutely gorgeous as usual."

"Not as hot as you, though." I sniffed. I needed her to focus on reading so I could finish chopping the onion as soon as possible. "Anyway, you wanna read something in there?"

Jujubee opened the book and immediately laughed, "Jesus Christ, Brie, bit dark."

She showed me the first page, childlike scribblings read 'Brianna's Diary. DO NOT TOUCH! Or this will happen to you!' An arrow led to a picture of a grave.

"I never even noticed that before," I chuckled.

"With a warning like that, I better find some crazy shit in here." she cleared her throat, "So starting in 1994, 'Diary Diary, Today, I had a fight with Jujubee. She really upset me, but I upset her too. I should say sorry. That's all. Bye.'" Jujubee lowered the diary, "you bitch, why did you upset me?"

"I have no idea, girl. I mean, didn't we do that a lot back then?" I shrugged.

"I bet you started it though," She lifted the book again, a coy smile on her face. "OK, moving on to 1995," she cleared her throat, "'Dear Diary, today Mommy and Juju's Mommy took us to see Pocahontas at the movies. It was very good. Goodnight.'" Jujubee paused to giggle, "God, I love how detailed this is. You could have added so much more."

"Girl, I was 8 years old. Writing more than 4 sentences was like writing the bible to me." I countered, finally scraping the onions into the pan with the peppers.

"Yeah, but we did so much more that day. We went to McDonald's after, we found that little frog pond in the woods." She pointed out.

I hadn't even remembered that. Now I kind of wished my younger self would have pushed herself to write more.

I was too busy rifling through my messy cabinet for oregano to notice Jujubee just flicking through page by page.

"But, you wrote 3 pages worth of poetry to Blair St Clair?"

Once I found the spice, I spun around to look at her, "Juju, I told you to only look at the pages that were labelled."

She held a hand up, "OK, I'm sorry." She closed the book.

I felt bad, thinking maybe my harsh tone brought the fun to a grinding halt. Squeezing my eyes shut, releasing a sigh, I said, "I'm sorry. That was uncalled for."

She took a sip of her water while I added the oregano to the saucepan.

"So, did you text her back?" She played with the glass in her hands.

I pursed my lips and shook my head. "Why? Do you think I should?" I asked quietly.

"Nah, not really."

"Well, why not?"

Jujubee shrugged her shoulders and went to look at her nails. "Don't know."

I clicked my heel, my tongue running along the top row of teeth behind my closed mouth. "Well, I've been thinking about it. I mean, maybe that's the problem. Maybe I could be a bit more responsive."

She made a humming sound. I was unsure what it was supposed to mean.

"OK, what's going on?" I put both hands on the counter.

"I don't know. I just think…" she paused, trying to find her words, "I don't see the point because the same shit will just happen again."

"The same shit?" I repeated, "what's that supposed to mean?"

"Well, her speaking all but 10 words to you and then completely ignoring your existence." She put a hand under her chin.

"Well, maybe that wouldn't happen if I actually spoke to her like I wasn't terrified for once," I suggested.

She squeezed her eyes together, "Oh no, Brie. I knew this was going to happen."

"What was going to happen?"

"The whole Blair thing. I thought you were over it. Well, until she messaged you recently, I had a creeping feeling that it was all gonna come back."

"Juju, listen to yourself. You're talking like this is an actual problem."

"I hate to say it, but it is. Do you remember the time she hung out with you in the library? You were so excited the next day. I hadn't seen you so happy in so long. You wouldn't stop talking about how she would probably be there again." She paused, "But she wasn't. And you were so disappointed."

"Yeah, but things could be different now."

"And how's that?"

"Well, I'm a different fucking person now, that's one thing. I'm successful, I'm smart, I'm hot as fuck, rich as fuck - -"

"And you think that's gonna be the game-changer for her? That she's gonna come running into your arms? Because if that's the case, that says a lot about her." Jujubee rolled her eyes.

"Well, I'm a big girl, now. If it happens again, I'll just get on with things. I'll move on.

"That's a lie."

I squinted my eyes. "Why are you being like this right now? You're so salty just because I fucked wrote a private letter to her as a child."

"This isn't about the letter, Brie. You know why I'm being like this. You shouldn't need to ask." But she continued, "You've never dealt with never having parents. You think that if Blair was to suddenly be truly interested in you, you'd get over the feeling of being unwanted. Yet you're surrounded by people who love and support you, who'd stick with you to the end. But right now, you don't give two fucks about them because you're too busy panicking about some girl from high school."

I lift my head again, putting one hand on the desk and the other on my hip, "Well, congratulations, Juju. Sounds like you got me all figured out. Hey, you wanna talk about my Grandpa next?"

She only reacted to that with a scowl. And she spoke again.

"You remember the prom? Do you remember what happened? Do you remember how she didn't do anything to stop Trevor?"

My eyes shifted away, just for a second. "She told him to stop."

"Which did nothing."

I wanted to argue how she was unfair. How it was so wrong to blame Blair for the prom incident. But I was distracted by a burning smell. Only now did I notice the onions and peppers blackening.

I quickly moved the saucepan off the heat, feeling it only radiating in my own face. I put a hand on the counter, the other on my hip. "OK, Juju, maybe you should leave."

It was safe to say Jujubee was taken aback. She remained still for a second before pushing her stool out. "So that's how it is? Kicking me out when you're faced with the truth?"

"Juju, just leave, please." I felt my hands clench around the edge of the counter, my nails digging into my hip.

"I am!" She grabbed her coat and stormed from the kitchen. I flinched upon hearing the door slam shut, and only then did it sink in - the dread, the feeling of regret.

I looked at the hob, the burnt vegetables unsavable. So they went in the trash. My stomach grumbled. But I couldn't bring myself to start over again.

Opening my fridge, my eyes were immediately on the cake. And I glanced over my shoulder, looking where she had sat, now feeling a sense of emptiness. Not in me, but the room. Like I was alone.

I was alone.

"Fuck. Fuck. Fuck." I repeated as my hand clenched on the door. The cool air from the fridge felt nice but not enough to stop my panic.

I looked at the cake again, feeling the urge to throw it out the window. Or maybe just send it back to her.

Bitchy, I know. But I couldn't help it. I wouldn't be feeling like this if she hadn't acted the way she did.

I slammed the door shut, kicking it for extra measure. And in my heels, I almost tripped.

Filled with more anger, I paced around for a few minutes, aggressively cussing to myself.

Don't get me wrong, one part of me said she was right about Blair.

No. She isn't. I was going to prove Jujubee wrong.

I picked up my phone from the counter, found the message and began to type with trembling fingers.

"Blair…" I panted, "So sorry...for getting back to you so late... I'm a busy woman, as you...probably already know...Look... I'm just gonna say it...I really like you...I always have...You make me feel so confused...yet so happy at the same time...I feel a connection between us...I always have...I don't know whether you ever felt it or not...but I do hope so...I would love to meet up with you sometime soon...and maybe have a coffee...I don't know...maybe even some wine, if you want. I look forward to hearing back. Brie x"

My thumb hovered over the send button. The only sound I could hear was the ticking of the clock. Not even my own breathing.

I pulled my thumb away, closed my eyes and breathed out. "Brie. You sound fucking crazy. You sound insane. You can't just send shit like that." I repeated words of the same nature to myself, trying to usher myself off the edge before I could do something idiotic.

"Jesus Christ." I opened my eyes again, which were now glossy with tears. I wouldn't blink. I wouldn't let them fall.

Big mistake.

I thought I tapped the chat bar, going to delete the message. But my blurred vision said, "haha, no."

I tapped the button next to the chat bar. The send button.

The little noise my phone made as it was sent may as well have been the same as a gun clicking.

"Oh, God." My eyes couldn't tear away from the small screen. My heart rate increased. "No, no, no, you fucking idiot!" I pressed my thumb down on the message.

There was a delete option.

I clicked it.

'Are you sure? The recipient may have already seen the message.'

I backspaced to check.

There it was, the tiny version of her profile picture falling to the bottom of the screen. She was reading it.

"Fuck!!" I blurted.

I put the phone down on the counter, began pacing for a moment, and looked back at the phone. This went on for a few minutes. I wanted to be as far from my phone as possible. But also needed to know if she had replied.

This was it.

Blair was going to know how I was weirdly obsessed with her.

She was going to know I was checking her out in the library that one time.

She was going to know that I had fingered myself so many times at the thought of her.

What were my options?

Suicide - Not gonna happen.

Running away - But the project.

Reply with 'Hey, sorry! My friend took my phone, haha' - did anyone ever believe that excuse?

Block her before she could reply - then she'd think I was even more crazy.

Call up her place of work and somehow get her phone confiscated - why, though? That would involve Facebook stalking her again, trying to think of an excuse. Even if I did so successfully, she still saw the message.

All of the options just lead to cons. It was hopeless.

With shaky fingers, I switched my phone off and practically threw it onto the counter.

My body sank to the ground, now holding my head in my hands.

What do I do? What do I fucking do?

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

2004

I was shaking. Only slightly.

There was something about the prom that made me feel so on edge.

Maybe it was all the people, all together in one room.

Perhaps it was the fact the chess boys asked to make out.

Or perhaps it was the fear of missed opportunities. Opportunities that involved a certain someone.

I watched from the side of the room as Blair took pictures with her friends on her pink digital camera. There was a feeling of regret causing my stomach to twist, my fists clenching onto my purple dress.

That could have been me.

I felt a hand moving a curled lock of hair from my shoulder.

"Just think, girl; we're almost there," Jujubee appeared in front of my vision, "College is just around the corner."

"I can't wait to be out of here," I spoke quietly.

Everyone turned their attention to the stage as Rosé appeared, announcing it was time to crown Prom King and Queen.

"Well, it's pretty obvious who our queen is." Jujubee crossed her arms.

I knew who she was thinking of. To be fair, it was pretty obvious. But I wasn't complaining.

Trevor was our Prom King, not my King anyway. I scoffed as he cheered, being pushed up to the stage by his team.

"Jesus Christ, who would have thought." Jujubee took a sip of her punch, spilling a drop on her lilac puffy-sleeved dress.

"And your Prom Queen is…" Rosé paused, pulling the result from the envelope.

3...2...1…

"Blair St Clair!"

I smiled for the first time since walking into the place. I applauded her victory as she walked up onto the stage.

Blair hugged Rosé and whispered something in her ear. I had no idea what it was, but I was too distracted as Trevor just stared.

"You wanna make a speech, girl?" Rosé joked into the mic.

Blair laughed, covering her face with embarrassment. She turned down the offer.

"OK. Everybody," Rosé held a hand to Blair and Trevor, "You're King and Queen of 2004."

Blair looked slightly uncomfortable as Trevor put an arm around her waist. Why couldn't he get the hint she was done with him?

The two got down from the stage, Trevor's gaze following her in confusion as she moved far away from him.

"Aren't they supposed to do a dance now?" Jujubee asked.

I shrugged. "I don't know, Juju. I've only seen proms in movies, and they're quite obviously exaggerated."

My eyes landed on Blair once more. Trevor was whispering something in her ear, and she shook her head, rolled her eyes and walked away. Yikes, he was desperate.

"Jesus, I'm fucking nervous." Rosé was approaching us now, well, the punch table we stood beside. "Getting up on stage gets my body shaking, you know?"

"Wish I could do that." Jujubee replied.

"Yeah, well, sometimes you just gotta do what you gotta do." Rosé replied.

I eyed her suspiciously. This was odd; she'd never really spoken to us before.

"But of course," she looked left, then right, before pulling a flask from her bra and pouring it into a cup, "this helps. You ladies want one?"

"Nah, I'm good," Jujubee made a stank face.

Me, on the other hand, having never drank alcohol in my life, piped up, "Actually, yeah. Could you just pour me a shot of whatever that is?"

"Yeah, of course," and she didn't lie. She poured me a shot of vodka. No spitting in the cup, no adding anything sneakily, no hostility.

She passed the cup to me, giving a mischievous wink.

Tossing it back, I was totally shocked by the burning sensation it caused to my throat. I began to cough and splutter.

"Girl, chill out, or you're gonna draw attention to yourself." Rosé looked around.

I placed the cup down on the table, the plastic practically crumbling in my hand.

"This is it. The beginning," Jujubee joked, dabbing the corner of my mouth with her pinky. I didn't even know there was a drop of liquid there.

And I didn't know there was a hair out of place either. Because she was stroking a soft hand down my temple to my cheek.

"Brie, do - -"

"Juju, I'm gonna ask her to dance with me," I said all too loud.

The hand dropped instantaneously, her smile falling in a matter of seconds. Of course, I expected this shocked reaction. Even Rosé had nearly choked on her drink.

"For real?" Jujubee asked after a silent moment.

"Yep," I answered proudly, putting my hands on my hips.

"I guess you've never touched a drop of alcohol in your life, loser." Rosé leaned close to me.

"Something like that." I felt slightly uncomfortable now that she was dangerously close to me.

She snorted a laugh, holding up her hands as she walked away, "I'm not responsible for this."

So this was what they called liquid courage. Yeah, it was one shot, but it was my very first. And I was already feeling it. The buzz.

I turned to make my way to the girl I loved when Jujubee grabbed my hand, "Brie, are you sure this is a good idea?"

"Yes," I replied too quickly, tugging to pull away.

"Are you sure?" Her brows knit, "You're not gonna be upset if she says no, right?"

One final strong tug was enough to release her grip on me, "No, Juju. I'll be fine, just...stop questioning me, OK?"

She was silent, her arms dropping by her side.

But I continued on in my mission, vision slightly blurred, insides warmed.

Everyone around us was gone like they had just stepped into another world, leaving Blair and me in this reality. Or maybe it was the two of us who disappeared, somehow falling into the wormhole and ending up in the other world.

Or maybe it was just liquid courage.

There were only a few metres between us now. "Blair?"

She had been taking a sip of her coke when she looked up and noticed me. Wiping the corners of her mouth, she put the can down.

"Brianna!" She beamed. Her eyes looked me up and down, causing a brief moment of panic, "wow, look at you. You look great."

"Yeah, right, compared to you." I stifled a laugh.

"Oh, shut up." She smirked.

"So, um…" I tucked a strand of hair behind my ear, looking away and to the ground, "I was just...wondering...if you'd wanna dance with me?"

I didn't lift my gaze. Only now did I understand what Jujubee meant. The girl hadn't even said no yet, and my heart was already sinking.

"It's just...this song is so good, and it's the end of the year, and we may not - -"

Before I could continue rambling, she cut me off.

"Sure. Yeah, I'll dance with you."

I lift my gaze to see her glittering smile. Like in the library, time didn't feel real anymore, and I needed to remind myself to breathe. "Really?"

"Yeah, of course." She briefly knit her brows like it shouldn't have been questioned. She took my hand in her perfect french manicured one, "Come on."

As we made our way to the dance floor, I was only now reminded that there were people here. So, we didn't slip through a wormhole. This was real. This was reality.

Blair found a spot on the floor, turned to me and wrapped her arms around the back of my neck.

For a moment, I was unsure of where to put my hands. I glanced over her shoulder, noting the couple also slow dancing. She has her arms around his neck. He had his arms around her waist.

I was hesitant at first but eventually gave in. Blair didn't mind. And I felt myself relax.

She just stared at me, the sweet smile still on her face. The music echoed around us. The lights were low. Pink tinted.

"So, how does it feel winning Prom Queen?" I asked. Of course, it felt amazing for her, but I needed to find an excuse to speak. Anything to avoid the somersaults my stomach was doing.

"I mean, it's nice, I guess. But, it's all bullshit anyway?" Her smile faltered, "Not something anyone in the future will give a fuck about, right?"

I disagreed. If I were to win prom queen, I would feel validated. And I would make sure I'd bring it up to everyone I ever met. Pathetic, I know.

"Well, I can't think of anybody better," I admitted. "Maybe they could have chosen a better King."

"Agreed." She nodded. "You know, literally just now, he tried to use this whole King and Queen thing to 'try again'. Not even that long before you came up to me. Brianna, I've already given him another chance. And he blew it."

"During the Summer?" I recalled.

"Yep." She pursed her lips.

"What did he do, if you don't mind me asking?"

"Oh, he just had some major anger problems," her eyes widened for a moment, "He never hurt me, though. He just...got so angry over the dumbest shit. It was just too much."

She puffed out a breath, the frown on her face appearing.

"You don't have to tell me any more," I said quickly.

"Sorry, I don't wanna get emotional." She looked back at me. "It's just... it's hard not to. You're a good listener."

How should I have felt knowing that was her analysis of me from very little time spent together? She really trusted me. "Blair... I'm sorry about that time in the library. When you mentioned my Grandpa. I feel terrible now."

"Please, don't. You were grieving."

'Was I really though?' I held back from saying.

"I never really had a Dad," I smiled, seeing his stupid smile in my head, "But he was the closest equivalent to that."

"I know what you mean." She began, "My Dad…" she trailed off for a moment, "He wasn't the best. You probably remember that one time I ran away as a kid. When you walked me to my Grandma's."

I wasn't even tense in the first place, but my body felt like it relaxed. "You remember that?"

"Of course I do. It really meant a lot, Brie." Her thumb stroked the back of my neck. I don't know if she did this intentionally or subconsciously. Was she even thinking about it? "That day, I never went back. Ever. My Grandparents took full custody of me, and they became my second parents. The ones I always deserved."

I felt my body relax even more like this was normal. "Blair, I wanna carry on something my Grandpa started."

"What's that?"

"It sounds crazy," I pause, "But he wants me to find a parallel universe."

I paused to take in her reaction. She did look taken aback for a moment. Could you blame her? "Is it even possible?"

"I mean, at first I thought he was a bit out there asking me something like that, on his deathbed and all. But I've been studying really hard, and I think it's achievable."

"That's interesting." She nodded. "So, what are you gonna do at college?"

"Drugs." I giggled before the smile dropped, "OK, not funny. Bad joke."

"I'm laughing, though." She was.

"Um, no. I'm gonna do Astronomy and Space science."

"I didn't know that was a major you could do," Blair replied.

"Me neither. What about you, though? Something in theatre?"

Blair lowered her gaze for a brief moment, "I dunno, Brie. I honestly don't see college as a me-thing. I'm constantly torn between theatre, fashion merchandising, cosmetology, politics..."

"Politics?" I laughed and instantly hoped she didn't take offence to that.

"What?" She smirked. "What's funny?"

"I just…" I paused, feeling my heart skip a beat as a particular memory came back. "This is crazy. I can't believe I remember this. All I can think about right now is the day we met. Remember the first day of elementary? On the bus? I told you I wanted to be a politician when I was older, just 'cause they liked to shout a lot. And you couldn't say the word right."

"Oh fuck, now that you mention it, I do remember." Blair laughed, "That was such a long time ago. We were so little." She looked away as if her mind had transported her to that moment. Did she remember it like I did? Did she remember how she held my hand and told me she was my friend?

And then never sat with me ever again?

My eyes had drifted away, looking over her shoulder at nothing in particular. The bad thoughts were taking over. I didn't want them to. I wanted to enjoy this moment forever. Just swaying back and forth with Blair in the middle of the dance floor.

She stroked her thumb on the back of my neck again, causing a spark to course through me.

Blair's looking at me again. "Brianna, how come we never talked more?"

I don't know if it was just me fantasising again, but her face was moving closer to mine, ever so slowly.

I had the answer to her question. But it couldn't ruin this moment. "I don't know," I whispered.

She was closer now, head tilted to the left.

And I found myself doing the same.

This was another fantasy. This isn't real.

I felt her breath on the corner of my mouth.

It felt real.

It was.

There was a frustrated roar.

A tight fist clenched around my arm.

I was pulled back forcefully.

My feet gave way.

I was on the ground.

"Are you kidding me??" Trevor stood in front of Blair, his face red with anger, "You won't fucking dance with me, but you'll dance with her??"

Everyone around us was just standing there, too shocked to do something.

"Trevor, what the fuck??" Blair went to move around him, trying to get to me. He only pushed her back.

"Of all the people, why her??" He grilled Blair with more questions. She looked afraid now.

Why the fuck wasn't anyone doing anything??

I felt a hand on my shoulder, but looking around, I saw it was actually Rosé. "Trevor, what the fuck??"

He turned to look as if offended that anyone else got involved. How could they not? Seeing her helping me stand must hit a nerve. Because he's snatched a cup of punch from a bystander, "Why are you defending the dyke??" And he threw the cup forward, the liquid drenching my hair and splattering my dress.

That was the final straw. I could feel my chest heaving.

I ran to the nearest exit. Running from the school. As soon as I felt the cool air on my skin, I wrapped my arms around my stomach. I was bent over, throwing up all the panic. Sparks of the bile dotted the bottom of my dress and shoes. I didn't care. My dress was already ruined.

I heard the door open behind me and immediately began to move again.

I tried to run, but the heels made it hard.

The person was in front of me now, hands on my face, tears streaking her face.

I expected it to be Blair.

But it was Jujubee.

"Brie, it's alright. I punched him for you." She whimpered, her hands on either side of my face, holding me tenderly.

My breathing was rugged, trying so hard to listen to her reassuring whispers. But in my head was the sound of the crowd gasping and Trevor shouting.

No one was going to forget about this. I'd be reminded by the stares in the corridors, how they'd whisper to each other.

"Let's go to my house. You can stay over if you want." Jujubee's sweet voice brought me out of my thoughts.

Words still failing to surface, I nodded.

As soon as we got in, she ran me a hot bath. Whilst I cleaned myself of the sticky punch that covered my hair and face, she made chocolate mug cakes with ice cream.

Sitting there in her room, dressed in her fluffy pyjamas, eating her food, I should have felt better. I should have been happy. But I just stared at the mug in my hand, still thinking of Trevor's anger and Blair's distressed face.

Jujubee took the mug from me, set it aside along with her own, and enveloped me in a hug. "Don't cry, Bri. Please, don't cry."

"I'm sorry, I didn't know I was crying." I wept.

"Don't apologise." She shushed me, "It's OK. You're OK."

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

2020

And even now, I didn't realise I was crying again. And as it was too late to stop myself, I remembered sobbing into Jujubee's shoulder, holding her tightly, like she was the only one who could get me through it. She was the only one who could get me through it.

The events of the prom left me scared, always so on edge when walking those school corridors. Just terrified that Trevor would round the corner and do something worse.

But Jujubee was there for me every time. She'd hold my hand, not giving a fuck about who looked at us weird.

I know I should have grown a backbone and defended myself, and what had actually happened shouldn't have been as damaging as it was. But, hey, I was only human.

Jujubee got in a lot of trouble for punching Trevor in the face. But she didn't mind. "Just as long as he got what was coming to him," she had said.

Hearing her retell the event, I wish I had been there. She had jumped on him, tackling him to the ground and punched him over and over again.

But as exciting as that all was, I didn't speak to Blair again. I didn't think about her. I didn't talk about her. I didn't even look at her. Blair wasn't the one to come after me that night. She never even approached me to talk about it. She didn't give a fuck.

So I kept my distance.

And just as life went on without her, she just had to go and message me. After years of silence, she couldn't have left well enough alone.

I finally lifted my head. I reached up and grabbed my phone. Turning it back on, I immediately deleted Messenger, hoping to never see Blair's response.

This would be the beginning of my journey toward happiness.

Yeah. That was it. That's what I would do.